The Adventures of Duck & Chicken
by Ethereal Prey
Summary: Damon just got dumped. Caroline needs a place to stay. They end up as roommates, and throw in a duck and chicken, what else could go wrong? AH/AU no longer a one shot.
1. Chapter 1

AN: Here's another one shot or sorts, though it could be a double shot who knows, but just something that came to me. Thanks for reading.

* * *

"Do we really need to be here?" Klaus asked

"I have to check up on my brother" Stefan said putting the key in the lock

"Last time I was here I lost my phone and my hand almost"

"Don't be such a baby" Stefan said as he opened the door

Stefan walked into the apartment and was shocked at what he saw. Half the apartment looked like a tornado hit it, clothes, food, everything scattered about. But the other half was clean, organized, pristine.

"Does your brother have a split personality now?" Klaus asked looking in

Stefan looked around wondering what had happened. He looked into the kitchen and saw half the sink was filled with dirty dishes that hadn't been done in weeks, while the other half was empty and clean.

"Damon?" Stefan called out

A white duck and chicken walked out and towards the kitchen.

"You're brother turned into a duck?" Klaus asked

"I have no idea what's going on here" Stefan said

The duck and chicken walked into the kitchen, while Stefan and Klaus followed them in. They saw the two birds were eating and drinking water from their bowls. They also saw there was a wee wee pad in the corner where they went.

"Are you sure your brother lives here? That we haven't just broken into someone else's apartment?" Klaus asked

"They key still works" Stefan said

Damon walked out in his pajamas pants, his hand in a box of cereal. His hair was messed up with bits of cereal in it.

"Damon?" Stefan called out

"Hey baby bro, what are you doing here?" Damon said as he walked into the kitchen

"Why do you have a duck and chicken?"

"Oh, that, I found the little chick a few weeks ago, someone's science experiment or something." Damon said reaching into the cabinet with the letter D on it.

"And the duck?"

"The chick was lonely. So I got him a friend"

"Any other animals in here?" Stefan asked

"Just your friend Klaus here" Damon said

"He's alive, so let's go" Klaus said

"Yes go" Damon pulled his hand out of the cereal box and threw cereal at Klaus

"Hey! That better not be on my side of the kitchen!" a female voice yelled

Stefan and Klaus looked behind Damon to see Caroline standing there dressed for work. She slung her bag over her shoulder and glared at Damon.

"The duck will eat it" Damon said

"No it won't, you know they can't eat that, they'll sick, do you want them sick?!" Caroline scolded

"No," Damon pouted, "I'll clean it up"

Stefan and Klaus looked at each other and then back at Damon.

"Who are you and what have you done to my brother?" Stefan asked

"Ask Blondie here" Damon said picking up the cereal off the floor

"Since we're stuck living together, I divided up the apartment. He can be as messy as he wants on his half. He just can't get anything on my half" Caroline said

"And he agreed to this?" Klaus asked in disbelief

"She managed to train the duck and chicken to go on the wee wee pads and to eat only in the kitchen" Damon said

"You did?" Stefan asked

"yes, they're actually smart animals. I'm going to be late, so I'll see you later. Nice seeing you Stefan, and Stefan's friend who talks funny" Caroline headed towards the door

The duck and chicken made quacking and chirping noises as Caroline headed out.

"See you later Blondie!" Damon yelled

"Bite me!" Caroline said as she closed the door

"you'd like it too much!" Damon yelled

"You seem to be doing well" Stefan said

"As much as I can be considering what happened"

Klaus looked at Stefan wondering what happened. And then back at Damon.

"It's not the end of the world, so you got dumped" Stefan said

"No, I don't get dumped! She had the nerve to dump me! Who does she think she is?!"

"So you're living in this rubble because of a girl?" Klaus asked

"His girlfriend, ex girlfriend Elena, decided that she didn't want to be with him anymore. So she up and left him and went to her new boyfriend's place" Stefan explained

"Really? Someone couldn't stand you?" Klaus said

"But it turns out that Elena, went to Matt's place, which is where Caroline comes in" Stefan said

"Who's Caroline?" Klaus asked

"Blondie, she just tore through here after organizing all the toothpicks in size order" Damon said

"You see, Caroline was dating Matt for the past year, and it turns out he was still in love with Elena. So Elena moves in with Matt and Caroline had no place to go"

"The plot thickens" Klaus said

"So my brother here thought it would be a great idea to have Caroline live here with me" Damon said

"Well she did clean up her half of the place" Stefan said

"She did, and she got duck and chicken in order. But she always wants to clean and organize, it's like living with martha stewart on crack" Damon said

"At least she's clean" Klaus said

* * *

Caroline walked back into the apartment. After a long day of work she wanted to just shower and relax with a glass of wine. She closed the door and the smell of something delicious hit her. She turned around and wondered what it was. She saw chicken walking around but not duck. She looked up on the counter and saw a roast duck cut up and she screamed.

"What?! What's going on here?!" Damon came rushing out

"You cooked Duck?!" Caroline screamed

"What? NO! NO! Duck is in the bathtub!" Damon yelled

"What?" Caroline asked

"He's in the bathtub! He's a duck, he likes water remember?! Chicken got bored and left"

"Where did you get the roast duck from?!"

"Klaus, he likes to be an ass"

"Oh, he bought it"

"What you think I'd eat Duck?! You think I'd do that?"

"No, course not, I just, I saw a roast duck on the counter! What was I suppose to think!?"

"I love Duck and Chicken! I'd never do anything to hurt them!"

"No, course you wouldn't. I'm sorry I jumped to conclusions."

There was quacking from the bathroom.

"I'm coming!" Damon yelled, "You've upset him, now I have to make more bubbles for him to calm him down"

Damon went back to the bathroom, leaving Caroline confused. She had only lived with Damon for a month and in that month's time they managed to be at each other's throats before finally settling in with each other. When she first stepped foot inside she was horrified. She didn't know how a person could even live in such a mess. And then she saw the duck and chicken. She thought Damon kept them around to eat them, but she saw a different side of them. She saw that even in the mess and the fact that he just didn't care about himself, he did care about the duck and chicken. He always made sure they had food and water. He always filled the bathtub for the duck and left the windows open for chicken to feel the sun on its feathers. And even though they both were dumped and betrayed by their significant others they managed not to kill each other in the apartment. Or hook up. They were both not interested in each other. Caroline needed a place to stay and Damon just needed someone to be there to make sure he wasn't dead. Caroline wondered what Damon did exactly as he slept in all day and didn't seem to go to work. Yet rent was paid, the utilities were paid, they weren't evicted so Caroline never thought to question it.

* * *

Caroline was heading home after work again, and she walked towards her apartment. She saw Klaus standing at her door, holding something in his hands.

"Oh come on Damon, let me in" Klaus banged on the door

"If that's another roast duck then you can take it with you" Caroline said

"It's not a duck"

"Guess Damon's in the bathtub" Caroline said taking her keys out

Caroline opened the door and walked in, Klaus followed her in. She noticed duck and chicken were sitting on a small blanket on the floor.

"Damon?" Caroline called out

Klaus placed the large container on the counter and opened it. Caroline's head snapped around. She could smell the delicious aroma.

"Oh my god! Is that-" Caroline ran into the kitchen

"Chicken and waffles" Klaus said

"With biscuits!"

"And honey"

Caroline reached in and grabbed a chicken leg and started to eat it. She stopped when she saw chicken and duck sitting on the blanket.

"You bastard! How could you!" Caroline yelled as she pointed the chicken leg at him

"You're the one who reached into the box love! No one forced you to eat it!"

"You've been tormenting Damon all week like this!"

"Not exactly tormenting"

"Stop it!"

"I'm not doing anything sweetheart. You're the one waving that fried chicken around. Careful wouldn't want to get crumbs on the floor"

Caroline realized what she was doing and stopped. She was going to put the chicken back into the box but stopped.

"it's the best chicken in town. Made by a little old grannie from the south"

Caroline looked at the chicken in her hand and wanted to eat it.

"Did you eat the roast duck?" Klaus asked

"What? No!"

"Why not? It's quite tasty"

"Stop it!"

"What?"

"They're right there!"

"So? You're not eating them" Klaus said as he reached into the box and took out a chicken wing and started to eat it

Damon walked into the apartment holding a bottle of bubble bath.

"Oh chicken" Damon said walking over

"Damon!" Caroline yelled

"Says the girl holding the chicken leg. I don't think Chicken appreciates that" Damon said taking a piece of waffle out

"I'm not eating it" Caroline said

"I am" Klaus added

"Where were you?" Caroline asked

"We ran out of bubble bath. Duck likes bubbles remember?" Damon said

"But-" Caroline started

"It's natural, organic, gmo free, and not tested on animals. It shouldn't hurt his feathers" Damon said walking towards the bathroom

Duck got up and followed him and chicken got up and followed duck.

"That is still the strangest thing I've ever seen" Klaus said

"Duck and chicken give Damon something to care about. He was a total mess when I met him"

"You don't say"

"Then again so was I. We were both incredibly messed up at the time"

"And look at you now"

"Why do you enjoy tormenting Damon?"

"I don't torment Damon. We just never got along that's all"

"He has that effect on people. I'm surprised I haven't killed him yet"

"Same here"

"So what exactly did he do to you?"

"That's a rather long story"

"And?"

"One we should have over dinner"

* * *

Hope you were amused. Yes I got the idea of duck and chicken from elsewhere. I haven't given them any names yet. Though I wonder if they really need it.


	2. Chapter 2

AN: alright, no longer a one shot, since this story is too ridiculous as it is. be amused.

* * *

Caroline walked out into the kitchen in a blue knee length sleeveless dress. She had a nude colored pump and then a black colored strappy sandal. Damon was refilling the food bowls when he saw her.

"Why do you have 2 different shoes on?" Damon asked

"I couldn't decide on which one to wear" Caroline said

The duck and chicken both looked at her and made noises.

"The nude heel?" Caroline asked

"No, the strappy sandal, the nude or whatever you call it looks like you're walking on a bread loaf, and you're not even walking gracefully" Damon said

"You don't have to be so rude about it"

"If I'm not you won't listen. Isn't that right guys?" Damon said looking at duck and chicken

Caroline huffed and went back into her room to switch the shoe out. There was a knock at the door.

"Speak of the devil, pay attention you two, the big bad is about to blow into the apartment and take our dear Caroline out for a spin, cause she seriously needs it." Damon said as he opened the door

"Damon" Klaus said

"Yes me, and what are you doing here? Dropping off chicken soup this time?"

"Actually I'm here for Caroline"

"Blondie? And what are your intentions with her?"

"Damon!" Caroline yelled from behind

"Are you taking her to eat more duck?" Damon asked

"No, sushi actually"

"Oh, well I expect her back by a reasonable hour, or else you'll have to deal with these two" Damon pointed at duck and chicken

"And don't get fresh with me, you better keep your hands to yourself. Caroline is saving herself for marriage, she might as well at this point, since it's already grown back." Damon said

"Damon! Shut up! I'll see you guys later" Caroline looked at duck and chicken

"I won't be living with a skank!" Damon yelled

"Look in the mirror!" Caroline said as she walked out of the apartment

Damon closed the door and looked at duck and chicken.

"Looks like it's just us tonight"

* * *

Caroline's back slammed into the apartment door as Klaus's lips were on hers. She fumbled with the keys in her hand to open the door before finally pushing Klaus off her. She turned around and opened the door and turned back and pulled him inside. The apartment was dark and quiet. She pushed Klaus against the door, closing it and kissed him. The two stumbled their way to her bedroom. Giggles and laughter could be heard before the distinct sound of a mattress squeaking. Damon woke up at the sounds and looked around. He could hear duck and chicken outside his door. He got up and opened the door and let them in.

"Yeah I know, they sound like wild animals going at it. I would be scared too" Damon said

Duck and chicken walked over to his bed.

"So you guys want the left or right side?" Damon asked

* * *

Caroline walked out of her room in her bathrobe. She walked into the kitchen to get coffee when she saw a chicken coop with a ramp. She paused and looked inside. Chicken was sitting in a nest. She turned and saw there was a inflatable pool in the living room. Duck was swimming around in it. Then next to it was a large crab shaped sandbox.

"What the hell happened last night?" Caroline said

"I was going to ask you the same thing" Damon said from behind her

"Damon!"

"Blondie! You scared Duck and chicken last night with your escapades with the big bad wolf. They were so traumatized, they slept with me last night"

"Oh stop it!"

"I heard you both last night, the moaning, and panting, and somebody slammed somebody against several pieces of furniture and against the wall, and then-"

"Alright! I get the idea! You heard us!"

"Not that there's anything wrong with that. Just don't scare duck and chicken. They've had a rough life"

"You never told me the whole story you know"

"You never asked"

"Well I'm asking"

"Where to begin?"

"It was a balmy night, I had ordered some pizza and was waiting for it to be delivered. I had to throw out some old pizza boxes-"

"Wait, you throw out stuff?"

"Well it was starting to grow legs and it wasn't paying rent so yeah I had to throw it out. Anyways, I was going to throw it out when the super was like those have to be recycled and they've already been taken down, so I was like fine, going for a walk. I went downstairs to put them by the curb and then I saw chicken. Well he wasn't a full grown chicken yet. He had these strange white furry feather things. You could tell he was part of some kid's science experiment. Cause they put chicken in a glass aquarium for a goldfish and had the stupid cardboard display behind him. The whole cycle of a chicken. The kid was a punk, he threw it out along with chicken, just cause he was a cute little chick anymore. Chicken just looked at me wondering why did this happen? Why am I out in the trash? Why doesn't anyone want me? I couldn't leave chicken out there. Chicken didn't deserve that, so I took him home, and let him have pizza"

"How do you know if it's a him? Or a her?"

"I'm not sure, I don't think chicken would appreciate it if you starting looking down there"

"You seem really buddy buddy with him. So what happened after?"

"I was trying to find out which punk ass kid threw chicken out. There aren't that many kids in this building. So when I did figure out who it was, I went to pay them a visit."

"You didn't beat up a kid did you?"

"No, I just slept with his mom, and told him to do experiments on plants instead"

"Wow that didn't traumatize him at all"

"Well after what he did to chicken, I think that's the least of his problems."

"Where did duck come from?"

"I was at the park, I thought chicken wanted some fresh air or something. We walked around and there was this duckling that was all alone, I wondered where its mother was. It didn't take long for me to figure out that a bunch of stupid kids grabbed him from his mom and left him there when they got bored. We gave duck some food and walked around the park looking for his mom. But there were no ducks around. It got dark so chicken insisted that we take him home."

"So you're blaming chicken for all this?"

"No, chicken was lonely, he can't speak human and he's probably tired of listening to me talk"

Caroline listened to Damon talk and realized he wasn't always a total dick. There was a part of him that actually cared. She was surprised that he'd rescued these animals and took care of them. He actually took care of them. She saw the heat lamps that were set up for chicken in the beginning so he couldn't get cold. There was always food and water. Granted Damon was messy as all hell, he let duck and chicken go wherever they wanted on the floor and apartment. But he would let duck swim around in the bathtub and chicken stand in the window looking out.

"Duck and chicken seem to be happy, and that's all that matters" Damon said

"I know we've never talked about this, but we should"

"Ugh, the talk"

"Is it wrong that we eat chicken in front of them? Is it wrong that we eat eggs in front of them? I mean it would be like us living with cannibals"

"We're not cannibals, and I don't think duck and chicken even realize what we're eating most of the time"

"Cause I am not turning vegetarian for this"

"God no!"

"We'll just eat more bacon"

"I like that idea blondie!"

* * *

Caroline was walking with Klaus back to her apartment. He was carrying a large box. They walked towards her apartment door when Damon opened the door and was carrying duck. He placed duck on the floor.

"Now you stay out here and think about what you've done!" Damon said

"What the hell Damon?" Caroline yelled

"You're a bad duck! Bad duck!" Damon said

"What did the duck do now?"

"You don't want to know. Chicken won't come out of his coop"

"Damon, you can't leave duck out here"

Damon looked over at Klaus who was holding the large box in his hands.

"What is that?" Damon asked

"A pig" Klaus said

"Come in" Damon opened the door and motioned for him to walk in. Klaus walked in and Caroline followed. Damon looked back at duck.

"Chicken is not a toy! You remember that!" Damon said

The duck quacked at him and flapped its wings.

"Alright fine, we'll get you toys tomorrow, but I'm not rewarding your bad behavior"

* * *

Hope you were amused. Yes the adventures of duck and chicken live on!


	3. Chapter 3

AN: Thanks for reading. Yes inspired by friends. No beta.

* * *

Caroline leaned back in the bathtub and closed her eyes. She had a long week at work, and was tired. She heard knocking at the door and groaned.

"Go away" Caroline said

"Duck wants to know what you're doing in there" Damon asked through the door

"No duck doesn't care"

"Duck wants to know if you used his bubble bath"

Caroline looked at the bubbles and then up at the bottle of bubble bath she used. It was the one Damon bought for duck.

"Go away!"

"Duck wants to know if you're swimming with his rubber duckies too"

"Duck doesn't care! Leave me alone!"

"Alright, you've forced me to do this"

There was some shaking of the doorknob and then the door opened. Damon stood there with duck and chicken standing next to him. Caroline screamed and tried to cover herself.

"Get out!" Caroline yelled

"I knew it! You're using duck's bubble bath! This was made especially for duck! Not you and your human skin!" Damon yelled

"I'm naked here, get out! GET OUT!"

"If it's something I haven't seen I'll throw a dollar at it! Are you sexting Klaus?"

"No!" Caroline yelled as she used the bubbles to cover herself

"You're boring, no wonder he hasn't been around. I miss that deliver service, he'd bring me chicken and duck and then disappear into your room afterwards, so I could eat in peace. Where is he these days?"

"I have no idea, he's not returning my calls"

"Is that what this is about? Klaus? He's a dick"

"Shut up Damon!"

Damon sat on the edge of the bathtub while duck and chicken walked closer to the tub.

"You're upset that Klaus, who's a dick if you forgot, isn't calling you anymore? Why do you even care about him?"

"Why do you even care?"

"The guy's a dick. His whole family's like that. They all think they're better than you, richer than you and they all talk funny"

"I wouldn't know. Whatever, this is stupid"

"It is stupid. You're moping around because of Klaus? And then before that Matt? Seriously? You have the worst taste in men"

"You should talk"

"Cmon get dressed and meet me in the kitchen. Duck wants his bathtub back"

"Duck is very demanding"

* * *

Caroline put on a fuzzy bathrobe and slippers and went into the kitchen. She found Damon in the kitchen pouring bacon fat from the frying pan into a mold.

"What are you doing?" Caroline asked

"Using the bacon fat for good" Damon said

Caroline watched as Damon picked up the sphere shaped mold and place it into the fridge.

"Your turn to make them"

"What is this?"

"Bacon fat"

"I can see that"

"Bacon fat turned into ice cubes, so we can drink it with our fine whiskey, or bourbon"

"Why?"

"Cause it tastes good"

"I don't like bourbon"

"You will now"

"He likes bourbon and all that stuff"

"Well then, you're gonna up show him."

"why?"

"Why the hell not? Geez if he suddenly got a pig would you stop eating bacon?"

"No"

"Then cmon get with the pouring, these ice cubes aren't gonna make themselves!"

"We're gonna need more bacon for all this!"

"Duck, Chicken you hungry?"

"You are not feeding them bacon!"

"Why not!? Don't turn into an elitist snob!"

"They're not suppose to eat bacon!"

"It's a pig! It's not cannibalism! Why are you denying duck and chicken?!"

"They're not suppose to eat meat!"

"I think google disagrees with you!"

There was a knock at the door and they both looked at it.

"Not it!" they both said

Caroline glared at him while holding the frying pan.

"I'll get it!" Damon ran to the door

Damon opened the door and saw who it was.

"We don't want any!" Damon said as he tried to close the door

"Caroline!" Klaus yelled

"We have enough animals in here, we don't need anymore!" Damon said trying to close the door

"Caroline! I just need to talk to you!" Klaus yelled pushing the door

Caroline slammed the frying pan onto the burner. She walked over to the door.

"Let him in" Caroline said

Damon sighed and opened the door. Klaus stood there looking at Caroline. His clothes were disheveled along with his hair. There were cuts and bruises on his face and hands.

"What the hell happened to you?" Caroline asked

"I was in jail" Klaus said

"Jail?" Caroline asked

"I knew they'd arrest you for being a dick!" Damon said smugly

"Damon! Go freeze the ice cubes!" Caroline yelled

"I got my eye on you, so do duck and chicken" Damon said walking into the kitchen

"Why were you in jail?" Caroline asked

"Can I come in?"

"Yeah"

Klaus walked into the apartment while Caroline closed the door.

"So talk" Caroline said crossing her arms

"Rebekah, my sister, and her boyfriend, ex boyfriend now, tried to kill her"

"Oh my god!"

"They were fighting, and he was choking her. I had to stop him, so I did. I kept hitting him to make him stop. I didn't realize that I kept hitting him until the police came. He's in the hospital now. My brother the lawyer tried to get me out, but they set the bail at a few million. It took my brother a few days to get the money."

"Is your sister ok?"

"Yes, well she's alive, she has bruises and is mortified. I came here to explain to you what happened"

"Let's get you cleaned up" Caroline said taking his hand

The two walked into the bathroom. Damon turned around.

"Hey! That's duck's bathroom! He doesn't appreciate you defiling it!" Damon yelled

* * *

Damon was frying up some eggs and looked over at chicken.

"You want some eggs?" Damon asked

Chicken clucked and flapped its wings.

"Oh too soon? Alright" Damon answered

They heard a strange weezing sound and Damon turned around. They saw duck weezing and throwing up.

"Duck are you ok?" Damon turned off the stove and rushed over to the duck

He picked up duck and held him in his arms.

"What's wrong?" Damon asked

* * *

Caroline awoke with an arm around her waist and a firm body pressed on her back. She smiled into the pillow as she felt the body behind her move.

"Morning sleepy head" Klaus said

"Morning" Caroline responded

Klaus placed a kiss on her neck, making his way down her shoulder.

"Would you like breakfast in bed?" Klaus asked

"Hmmm yes"

"I do like it when you stay over"

"Me too, I get breakfast"

"I knew you were just using me"

Caroline's phone started ringing. Judging by the ring she knew who it was. She groaned. She reached out to answer it.

"What is it?" Caroline asked annoyed

"Something's wrong with duck! I have to take him to the vet but chicken's freaking out! Duck won't fit in the carrier and I can't leave chicken behind!" Damon said

"Whoa! Slow down!"

"Caroline! I need you here! You can have morning sex later!"

"Damon!"

"Please Caroline, duck is really sick, he's throwing up all over the place"

"Let me get dressed"

"Underwear is optional!"

Caroline hung up and started to get out of the bed.

"Leaving so soon? That does shake a man's self confidence" Klaus said

"Something's wrong with duck, we have to take him to the vet"

"Why does that require both of you?"

"something about chicken freaking out and not fitting into a carrier or something"

"What?"

* * *

Caroline rushed back to her apartment, after apologizing to Klaus and promising him that they'd make up for it later. She opened the door to find Damon holding duck as he threw up all over him. Chicken running around Damon clucking and flapping its wings frantically.

"What the hell?" Caroline said

"You're here!" Damon said

"I leave you alone for a day and this is what happens"

"I can't get duck into his carrier, well chicken's carrier. He won't go into it."

"Just back him up into it, I'll hold the carrier and you just put him in"

Caroline picked up the carrier which was for a cat, and opened the door and Damon slowly turned duck around so its tail was facing the door. Duck started flapping its wings.

"Alright, no carrier then" Damon said

"Well you're going to have to carry him then" Caroline said

"Fine, just give me a blanket or something, I don't want him to get cold"

Caroline picked up the blanket that duck and chicken always sat on. She wrapped it around duck who seemed to calm down.

"Chicken is getting anxious, I don't want to leave him alone here" Damon said

"Fine, we'll take chicken"

Caroline chased after chicken with the carrier. Chicken kept running.

"Chicken you get your feathered ass here right now! We're taking duck to the vet, you can come with us or not!" Caroline yelled

Chicken finally stopped running and stood still. Caroline picked him up and held him close.

"You're too big for the carrier. I'll just wrap you in something" Caroline said walking into the hallway

She came back with chicken wrapped in one of Damon's shirts. She threw a clean shirt at Damon.

"Let's go, I'm missing breakfast in bed for this" Caroline said

* * *

Caroline and Damon arrived at the vet's office. The girl at the desk April made them fill out a few forms.

"No you don't understand! I have a sick duck here!" Damon said

"Damon calm down" Caroline said holding chicken

"No she doesn't understand, Duck is really sick, duck needs to see a doctor. NOW!"

"Sir, is your animal bleeding?" April asked

"No, he's throwing up all over the place" Damon answered

"Alright, just take a seat and you will be called" April answered

"My duck is sick!" Damon yelled

"Damon! You're making duck nervous and freaking out chicken" Caroline said

Damon paused and looked down at duck and chicken. He saw the people in the waiting area were all staring at him as well.

"Fine" Damon hissed

Caroline held chicken closer and set him on her lap as she sat down. Damon held duck close.

"I'm sorry Duck, I don't know what's wrong with you. But the vet will fix you up and you'll be wading in your pool in no time"

"He'll be fine Damon, just don't stress him out. Animals pick up on it" Caroline said

"He's my duck. I can't not worry. I found him when he was abandoned, and he makes chicken happy" Damon said as he stroked duck's feathers

"And he'll be fine"

A boy walked in with his parents. He held a cat in his arms and sat down next to Caroline. Chicken began clucking and flapping its wings. Caroline tried to keep him calm. Duck picked up on Chicken's fear and started to do the same.

"It's not a cat! Calm down!" Caroline said

The boy looked at the two and got up and sat elsewhere. Duck and chicken calmed down.

"I could be having breakfast in bed right now" Caroline said

"With Klaus? He's a dick"

"Why do you two not like each other?"

"It's a long story"

"Are either of you going to tell me?"

"No"

"Salvatore, Damon, the doctor will see you" April called out

Damon got up with duck along with Caroline. They walked to the desk where April was.

"Here" Damon said

"Right this-" April started to say

Just then a woman burst into the doctor's office holding a small bundle in her hands. Her arms and shirt were covered in blood.

"I need to see a doctor!"

Damon and Caroline looked at the crazed woman.

"I was here first!" Damon yelled

"My dog! They were kicking him! And he's bleeding, and I don't know what to do!" the woman cried

Caroline reached out and placed her hand on Damon's arm. They could see through the mass of black fur and blood was a dog struggling to breathe. Damon looked down at the mess in her arms.

"What is that? A mop?" Damon asked

"He's a puli! And they were kicking him for no reason!"

"This way" April motioned for her to follow

"Don't worry duck, the bleeding mop needs to see the doctor first. Then it will be your turn"

* * *

"It seems your duck has had an adverse reaction to the duck feed that you've been feeding it. The brand that you've been using recently changed their formula, causing several poultry to have the same adverse effect" the vet said

"But chicken seems fine" Damon said

"Your chicken may not have the same reaction, but it's best that you find an alternative feed for the duck. Might I also suggest that you incorporate a few snails and other forms of protein into its diet"

"Snails? Fancy, like escargot?"

"Ducks in the wild eat a wide variety of things, you should switch it up a bit, and make sure gets to swim too"

"He has his own pool, chicken has a sandbox"

"Make sure the duck has water and it should be back to normal in a few days. But for now give him some leafy greens, lettuce, swiss chard"

"You're eating better than me Duck"

"If anything happens just come back"

"Thanks doc"

Damon picked up duck and chicken and headed out. Caroline was watching through the window what was happening to the dog. Caroline was standing next to the woman who brought the dog in. The woman was crying.

"Hey, he's in good hands" Caroline said

"I don't know why they were doing it, they were just kicking him"

"Who?"

"My idiot brother's friends. He's on tour and asked me to look make sure the dog had food and water. When I got there his friends were there kicking him. That poor dog was just laying there wondering why they were hurting him"

"They'll take care of him"

One of the doctors who were working on the dog came out.

"Rose?" the doctor asked

"Yes?"

"Your dog sustained extensive trauma, he has a few broken ribs, internal bleeding, and a fracture in one of his legs, but he should recover."

"Thank you doctor"

"He's sedated right now, but you can come in to see him"

"Yes, thank you"

Rose and the doctor walked into the room where the dog was. It was a black dog with long black fur that twisted into rods that resembled a mop. Rose walked over to the dog and wiped her tears.

"You'll be ok" Rose said

"Her dog's got dreadlocks!" Damon said

"Damon!" Caroline scolded

"You left chicken alone" Damon said handing chicken to her

"You seemed fine in there"

"So we have to get new feed, and some leafy greens for duck, organic, cause I don't want no pesticides or any weird stuff going on there. Duck has a sensitive stomach"

"And what about chicken?"

"Chicken will survive. Chicken's a survivor. We have to get some escargot for duck too"

"Snails?"

"Yeah, you have one picky friend chicken"

* * *

Caroline was drinking her wine during dinner while Klaus's hand crept under the table and onto her thigh. She raised her eyebrow at him, and his hand traveled higher. She put the glass down and with her other hand reached down to stop him.

"You don't really want me to stop do you love?" Klaus asked

"Check!" Caroline called out

* * *

Caroline and Klaus stumbled into her apartment. Klaus stepped a rubber ducky squeak toy as he made his way to her bedroom. When they made it inside he pushed her onto the bed, while standing at the edge of the bed. Caroline sat up and reached for his belt. Her hands unbuttoned and unzipped him and was wrapped around him. Klaus wasn't able to say anything when he felt her mouth on him. He heard wings flapping, and turned his head. Duck and chicken were standing there looking at him.

"Stop, "Klaus managed to get out, "This is getting weird!"

Caroline stopped and looked up at him confused.

"What?" Caroline asked

"The duck and chicken are staring at me!" Klaus said

Caroline turned her head and saw the two were standing there watching them. She started to giggle a bit.

"You two get out!" Caroline yelled

The duck and chicken flapped their wings and clucked and quacked as they made their way out of the room. Caroline got up and closed the door. She reached down and took her shirt off and threw it onto the floor.

"Now where were we?" Caroline asked

* * *

Duck and chicken fear nothing! And apparently ducks do eat leafy greens like swiss chard, so says google. hope you were amused. A puli is a real dog that's hair twists into rods that kinda looks like a mop in a way. The puli is based off Winston a puli dog that was rescued by Gavin Rossdale. And before Gavin took him in, Winston was being kicked around by some friends of his. Needless to say, Gavin kept the dog and ditched the "friends"


	4. Chapter 4

AN: Thanks for all the reviews and such. No beta still. see you at the bottom.

* * *

Damon was in the kitchen shucking oysters. Duck and chicken were standing there watching him.

"What are you two up to? You have a pool, a sandbox, a coop, a nest, why are you looking at me?" Damon asked

Duck and chicken merely looked at him still. They both turned and looked at the door. Caroline opened the door and walked into the apartment.

"I'm tired, this day is too long" Caroline said

"Duck! Chicken, go massage blondie's feet" Damon said

Duck and chicken flapped their wings and clucked and quacked at him.

"Or not" Damon added

"What are you doing?" Caroline asked

"Shucking oysters"

"Why?"

"Chicken needs some calcium, so they say to grind it up and let him eat a bit"

"So why did you get so many?"

"Well you can't just buy one, so I got a dozen"

"Are you going to eat all of that?"

"You want some?"

"Yes! I love raw oysters!"

"Since when?"

"Since Klaus introduced it to me"

"Like you two need to eat anymore oysters, it's bad enough duck and chicken are traumatized by you two"

"Shut up Damon!"

"I had to put a doggy door so duck and chicken could come into my room when he's over"

"Stop being dramatic, you put doggy doors on the bathroom too"

"So I take it, you've completely forgotten about Matt"

"Like you've forgotten about Elena?"

"I asked first"

"Klaus is good for me I guess. He's not trying to make me into anything, he's not trying to change me"

"Klaus is a dick, but he knows what it's like when people try to make you into something you're not, he knows what it's like not to fit in"

"How do you know that?"

"I've known him for a long time, too long"

"Yeah and you both hate each other"

"Hate is such a strong word, dislike is more like it. I just wish Stefan never found him that day"

"So this is about Stefan! I knew you two had some weird brotherly incest thing going on"

"NO! This is NOT game of thrones here! He's my brother!"

"You're jealous of Klaus's friendship with Stefan"

"I am not! Klaus is just a dick, apparently one that you've been riding"

"Don't act like you haven't been seeing Rose! I saw you two together at the coffee shop!"

"It wasn't a coffee shop, it was a tea house"

"Whatever! I saw you two! I knew there was something going on there!"

"I just wanted to see if the mop was ok"

"Her dog has a name, and it's not mop"

"It looks like a mop when it walks around, like it's dusting up her apartment when he walks around and sits. It's a little creepy, like a mop with eyes"

"You've been to her apartment?"

"I didn't say that"

"You have! Who's been riding who here?!"

"Gentleman never tells"

"You are neither. Wait, you left duck and chicken by themselves?"

"I left the tv on and gave them the remote"

"Really?"

"They're not little chicks or ducklings anymore. You can't treat them like that!"

"Oh stop it, you left them alone cause you wanted to get some"

"Hey! I spend all day with them, making sure the pool is at the right temperature, the sandbox is clean, the have their organic food, and spring water. I make sure the heat lamps are on if they want it, I make sure their blankets are clean and extra fluffy and there bubble bath is extra bubbly, so forgive me for having a social life!"

Caroline tried to hold in her laughter but couldn't anymore.

"Do you hear yourself?!"

"What?"

"You do more than enough for duck and chicken. A little too much at times. They have so many toys that they kick around. I'm sure duck wonders why there are all these yellow rubber duckies around all the time. And I know you've been teaching chicken how to play tic tac toe"

"It's good to have skills so they're not a stay at home bird"

* * *

Caroline slowly awoke with the feeling of a warm body next to hers. She opened her eyes and saw Klaus laying next to her sleeping. She moved slowly trying not to wake him. She liked mornings like these, where it was just quiet and just the two of them. His apartment was huge, bigger than her house back in Mystic Falls. Slowly she pulled the sheet down his body, exposing his naked body. Caroline moved down between his legs. She took a hold of him which was already happy to see her. Her hand slowly jerked him. She took him into her mouth. She looked up and slowly bobbed her head. Klaus was still asleep. His breathing became shallow, and a small groan escaped his lips. His hand reached down and found its want into her blonde curls. It gently cradled her head. Caroline looked up wonder why he wasn't waking up. Determined she released him and straddled him. She sank down on him, letting a small moan escape her lips. Her hands were on his chest as she slowly started to rock her hips. Klaus was still asleep, in that point between sleeping and waking. He felt something warm on him. Very warm. He could hear something, he wasn't sure what. Caroline threw her head back as she could feel herself about to finish before he woke up. Klaus could hear the sounds getting louder and louder. He felt the bed shaking. He opened his eyes and saw Caroline on top of him. Her eyes were closed, her mouth was open, as she was the source of the noise. He looked down and saw that she was indeed riding him. His hands grabbed onto her hips. Her eyes flew open as she screamed out his name. She fell ontop of him, trying to catch her breath. Klaus held her close, as his fingers drew circles on her skin.

"Now that you've used me while I was sleeping, do you mind if I have a go at it?" Klaus asked

"Huh?"

Klaus flipped her onto her back, and rolled on top of her.

"You obviously just used my body for your personal pleasure, not that I mind"

"I was trying to wake you up"

"Well then you can wake me up like that anytime you want"

* * *

Damon was at the farmer's market buying cabbage and swiss chard for duck. He was looking at duck shaped cookies when he felt something on his leg. He looked down and there was a black mop next to him.

"You're the mop dog" Damon said

"He has a name" Rose said

"But he'll always be mop dog to me" Damon said

"What are you doing here?"

"Buying organic greens for duck. And looking at duck cookies"

"I was going to get some dog cookies"

"I wonder if they make chicken cookies"

"Gavin seems to like you"

"All animals like me"

"Well can you watch him for a second while I get him cookies? He has a tendency to whine and beg when he's near that booth"

"Alright"

Rose handed Damon the leash and went to the dog cookie booth. Damon looked down at the black dog.

"You really do look like a mop you know"

"Damon?" a female voice called from behind him

Damon turned around and saw Elena standing there.

"Elena?" Damon asked

"Hey, you look good"

"I know"

"You got a dog?"

Damon looked down at Gavin and then back at her. He saw Elena trying to figure out what kind of dog he was and then looked at the greens he was carrying in his bag.

"He's a strange dog" Elena said

"He's not strange. He's a dog and he has a name"

"I never thought of you as a dog person that's all"

"Well you never really knew me then did you?"

"I don't want to fight"

"Course not, why don't you just go back to your quarterback"

"I never meant to hurt you"

"I don't care"

"Damon, I had to do what was best for me"

"And I'm doing what's best for me, leaving"

"Please Damon"

"Leave me alone"

"Damon!"

"Did you even think about what was best for Caroline? What you were going to do to her? Wasn't she like your friend or something?"

"She is my friend, and what do you know about Caroline?"

"She lives with me"

"What?"

"What do you care? You have your quarterback"

"Could you try to be civil? Or try to be friends"

"People only say that to be nice. I have no intentions of ever be your friend. Let's go Gavin"

Damon picked up the black dog and carried him towards the cookie booth. Elena watched as Damon walked off. She saw Rose turn around and wondered why Damon was holding Gavin. Gavin barked happily as Rose gave him a dog cookie. He handed the dog back to her and kissed her on the cheek and left quickly.

* * *

Caroline sat on a stool in Klaus's massive kitchen. Klaus had already made Caroline the perfect cup of tea and she was watching him make breakfast. It was almost strange to see him so relaxed and not in a suit. She took a sip from the tea cup and set it back down on the saucer. Klaus turned around and set a plate in front of her. One the plate were eggs, bacon, sausage, beans, toast and a sliced tomato.

"Do you eat this every day?" Caroline asked

"No, though I try to"

Caroline took a bite of the bacon and then looked back at Klaus. He was only wearing his pajama pants, while she took his t shirt to wear.

"This is nice" Caroline said

"What? Me cooking breakfast for you?"

"That too, but it's quiet here"

"Ah yes, no feathery fowl running about, flapping their wings, clucking or quacking and staring at me"

"They do not stare"

"They were staring at me that time. It was completely awkward"

"Only for you, they wanted a whole show"

"You'd put me on display like that love?"

"Don't worry they'll throw a dollar at you eventually"

"A dollar? I'm insulted"

"You don't have that new in box feel anymore"

Klaus pulled her off the stool and into his arms. He kissed her well pushing the plate and tea cup aside. Caroline hands reached into his hair and neck. He lifted her up onto the counter. His hand reached up her thigh while hers reached for his pants. He pulled the t shirt she was wearing up and over her head and tossed it onto the floor. He pushed her back onto the counter, her back on the cold surface as his hands held onto her hips. He slowly pushed inside her and her back arched off the counter.

The door suddenly opened. Kol walked in and turned his head to see who was on the counter. Caroline saw Kol standing there and screamed.

"So soon love?" Klaus asked

Caroline sat up and tried to cover herself, pushing Klaus away. She ran into the bedroom. Klaus looked up and saw Kol standing there.

"What the bloody hell are you doing here?!" Klaus yelled

"You know people eat on that counter" Kol said

"Get out!"

"But I'm your baby brother!"

"I didn't give you that key to be a pervert!"

"You're doing that fine all on your own"

"Get out!"

"Oh come now brother."

"Get out!"

"You gave me that key in case of emergencies, this is an emergency"

* * *

Who doesn't like duck and chicken? Aren't they greatest?


	5. Chapter 5

AN: Thanks for reading. who doesn't like a laugh every now and then? No beta.

* * *

Caroline sat in the bathtub. She used duck's bubble bath again but she had duck in with her. He was swimming around. Caroline leaned back against the tub.

"And then his brother just walks in on us! I was so mortified! I can't believe it! I was completely naked!" Caroline said

Chicken sat down on the blanket near the bathtub listening.

"How am I going to live this down? How am I going to face him?" Caroline said

Damon walked into the apartment wondering where duck and chicken were. He looked inside the coop and saw chicken wasn't there. He wondered where they went and walked down the hallway. He heard duck quacking and realized he was in the bathroom. He tried to open the door but it was locked.

"Duck are you in there?" Damon asked

"He's taking a bath with me" Caroline said

Damon got on his hands and knees and stuck his head through the doogy door. He saw chicken sitting by the tub, duck and Caroline were in the tub.

"Damon! Get out!" Caroline yelled

"Are you using duck's bubble bath again!?"

"Damon!"

Damon pulled his head out. A few moments later the door opened and Caroline used the bubbles to cover herself.

"Please, you're gonna have to earn this dollar" Damon said

"You have no concept of boundaries" Caroline said

Damon sat on the edge of the tub and looked over at duck.

"Is she talking your ears off?" Damon asked

"Go away!"

"What's wrong now? Klaus being a dick again?"

"No, his brother walked in on us"

"which one?"

"What do you mean which one?! How many does he have?"

"A lot actually"

"I don't know. I was so mortified. He walked in on us in the kitchen, and I was completely naked. And he stood there and watched us!"

"Kinky!"

"No it wasn't! He was there for a second and then I screamed and ran off"

"Sounds like his younger brother Kol. That guy's got no shame, and he's worse than me"

"How is that possible?"

"I'd thrown a dollar at you. Kol just got a free show"

"I couldn't believe it. I just wanted to die"

"So did you put your clothes on and introduce yourself?"

"No, because Klaus had to leave, family emergency or something. Has to do with his sister again"

"His sister? Bexx? That girl gets into so much trouble. Especially with guys. she has terrible taste in men"

"Well whatever happened he had to leave, so I was left alone in his apartment. Doesn't do the greatest for my self esteem you know"

"Why are you so into Klaus anyways? He's a dick"

"You're not helping!"

"Fine, I'll distract you then. I saw Elena"

"What?"

"I ran into her at the farmer's market"

"What were you doing there?"

"Duck needs cabbage and swiss chard. I ran into Rose and her mop"

"Right that trip was just for duck right?"

"It was. I ran into her by accident, and then Elena shows up, going oh hi, how are you? I didn't want to hurt you and all that crap. I swear I wanted to strangle her"

"Get in line"

"See now you're distracted"

"I can't believe she did that to me! Bad enough Matt dumped me and kicked me out of his apartment, but then I find out it was for her and she's suppose to be my friend!"

"You know I saw some duck cookies at the market. I wonder if we can make cookies for ducks and chickens"

"And she was all like I am your friend but I had to do what was best for me"

"What do you think you put in cookies for birds? I think google knows"

"Are you even listening?"

"Yes, Elena's selfish as she always is. You know before we got together she had a thing for Stefan. But Stefan didn't want any of that"

"Stefan was the only one with a brain it seems"

"Oh cmon, don't be like that. Let's make cookies"

"Cookies?"

"Yeah, dogs get cookies, duck and chicken should get cookies too. You've been in there too long, you're gonna get pruney"

* * *

"Rebekah! Open this door!" Klaus yelled as he banged on the door.

"You have to promise to calm down first!" Rebekah yelled through the door

"I promise nothing! Now open this door!" Klaus yelled

"No!" Rebekah yelled back

"OPEN THE DOOR!" Klaus roared

"I don't want to call the police but I will!" Rebekah said

"Good! Then they can drag you out here!" Klaus said

"Then you'll spend another night in jail then!" Rebekah said

"Call Elijah" Klaus said

"I already did, and Finn" Kol said

"Kol!? You traitor!" Rebekah yelled

"Me?! You're the one who's lost your mind!" Kol said

"Shut up both of you! Leave me alone!" Rebekah said

"What is that noise?" Alexander asked

"He's in there?!" Klaus yelled

"Open the door Bexx!" Kol yelled as he started banging on the door

The door finally opened. Standing there was Alexander in a bathrobe. Next to him was Rebekah in a bathrobe. Klaus and Kol both looked at each other and then back at the two before them.

"Ew!" Kol covered his mouth

"How dare you!" Klaus lunged at Alexander

Kol pulled Klaus back.

"Me first!" Kol yelled

"You will do no such thing!" Rebekah said standing infront of Alexander

"We'll both do it" Kol said

The two of them both lunged at Alexander. Rebekah moved out of the way while the three of them were fighting with each other on the floor.

"Stop it!" Rebekah yelled

Rebekah grabbed a pillow off the couch and started hitting them as they were fighting.

"Stop it! You have no right!" Rebekah yelled

Elijah and Finn showed up and looked at what was happening.

"Should we turn on the hose?" Finn asked

"I suppose we should stop them" Elijah said

The two older brothers walked in and pulled them apart.

"Calm yourself" Elijah said as he held onto Klaus

"We will be calm once he leaves!" Kol said

"Well he's not, so you should all leave!" Rebekah said

"Why would you let him back into your life?! After what he did?" Klaus asked

"I love him" Rebekah said

"You love him!? He almost killed you!" Klaus yelled

"Did you forget that?!" Kol yelled

"I think she did, she dropped the charges against him" Elijah said

"You what?!" Kol and Klaus yelled

"Just get out!" Rebekah said

"NO! Get dressed! I'm tired of this!" Finn yelled

Everyone paused and looked at Finn.

"Get dressed Rebekah, you too pretty boy. I'm not having my time wasted by you any longer." Finn said

"There are 4 of us, I suggest you leave Alexander before new charges appear" Elijah said

* * *

Caroline and Damon were in the kitchen making duck shaped cookies. Caroline had on an apron and her hair up in a bun. Damon was just making a mess as always. They both had flour in their hair and on their faces. They were dancing around and taking the cookies out of the oven and icing some of them. There was a knock at the door.

"Not it!" they both said

"Maybe it's Klaus with more fried chicken and biscuits" Damon said

"Maybe it's Stefan" Caroline said

"Stefan has a key"

"You just want me to get the door"

"Yeah I do"

Caroline put the cookie tray down and answered the door. She opened the door and froze.

"Hey" Elena said

"Damon it's for you!" Caroline said as she walked back to the kitchen

Duck and chicken walked closer to the door. Elena looked at the duck and chicken. Duck and chicken started flapping their wings and clucking and quacking.

"What's with you guys?" Damon asked as he walked to the door, "Oh it's you"

"Hey I just want to talk" Elena said

Duck and chicken started to get angry. They walked towards the door and Elena took a step back.

"Since when did you get those two? You were never an animal person" Elena said

"Well you never really knew me did you?"

"Can we just talk?"

"Hmmm, looks like duck and chicken don't like you"

Caroline walked over and saw the two birds angry.

"Hey, what's with you two?"

"They don't like Elena it seems. Animals are always the first to know" Damon said

"Calm down duck" Caroline said as she picked up duck and held him close

The feeling of Caroline's body seemed to calm duck down. The duck glared at Elena.

"Oh so you two are a thing now?" Elena asked

Damon reached down and picked up chicken. He held chicken up and into Elena's face. Chicken flapped its wings and tried to peck at Elena's eyes. Elena screamed and ran off.

"Good job" Damon said as he closed the door

* * *

"I'm not a child!" Rebekah yelled

"Then stop acting like one!" Elijah said

"There is only so much I can do before people start to notice" Finn added

"I never asked for any of you to butt into my life!" Rebekah said

"You are our baby sister, our only sister, who is insistent on throwing her life away with any man that gives you any sort of attention!" Klaus said

"Please Bexx, just think about it" Kol said

"No! He makes me happy!" Rebekah said

"He also was choking the life out of you!" Klaus said

"Just shut up!" Rebekah yelled

"How about we go to dinner? I think we're all annoyed and agitated now, and being hungry doesn't help. Let's get something to eat and we'll discuss it more, calmly" Finn said

"Fine" Rebekah said

* * *

Caroline and Damon were picking up a few more things at the supermarket. They gave duck and chicken the remote to the tv and told them they'd be gone a short while. Caroline picked up a few more things to make more cookies. Damon came back holding up a can of crescent rolls triumphantly.

"I love these things, we have to get those mini hot dogs too" Damon said before disappearing

Caroline watched as women flirted with Damon shamelessly. She wondered how he was still single even now. She kept walking. She realized what aisle she was in and grabbed the box and threw it into the basket. Damon returned with his mini hot dogs and another 2 tubes of crescent rolls. Damon looked into the basket and smirked.

"Really? You need that many? You know you can buy them in bulk" Damon said

"What?"

"I get mine in bulk. I'm sure Klaus does too"

Caroline flushed pink and looked down at the box of condoms in her basket.

"Duck and chicken are waiting for us"

* * *

Finn and Elijah walked into the restaurant first. Rebekah walked out of the cab with Kol and Klaus. Klaus pulled Rebekah's jacket around her closer, and moved her hair out the collar of her jacket.

Damon and Caroline were carrying their groceries back when Caroline stopped. She saw how intimate and close Klaus was being with the blonde girl. How he moved her hair out of the collar of her jacket and then smiled at her. The young girl smiled back. Klaus put his arm around her shoulders and they walked towards the restaurant.

"That bastard!" Caroline said

"No Caroline, it's not what you think" Damon said

Caroline ran towards the restaurant while holding her bag of groceries.

"I just want my crescent rolls!" Damon said as he chased after her.

"What about duck and chicken?!" Damon yelled

Caroline opened the door to the restuarant in time to see Klaus help the blonde out of her jacket. He held it for her and she reached over and fixed his tie. He leaned in and kissed her on her forehead. Kol was talking to the hostess, rather flirting shamelessly.

"Asshole!" Caroline yelled as she threw the box of condoms at Klaus

"Caroline!" Klaus said surprised

Kol turned around and saw Caroline standing there holding a bag of groceries.

"So that's what she looks like with clothes on" Kol said

"Shut up Kol!" Klaus said

"Who the hell is this?" Rebekah asked

Damon ran in and saw them standing there. Caroline reached into the bag and pulled out the can of crescent rolls. She pulled the label off and then reached out and pulled Klaus by his pants towards her.

"Sweetheart?" Klaus asked

She pulled his pants by the waist just enough to shove the can down his pants and then she punched it hard. It popped open and Klaus yelped and hunched over in pain. Kol cringed and backed away.

"Not the crescent rolls" Damon said

"Who the bloody hell are you?!" Rebekah yelled

"I'm leaving" Caroline said as she walked off

"But the crescent rolls!" Damon whined

* * *

Yes the poor crescent rolls. Who doesn't love crescent rolls? Seriously pillbury makes the best ones ever, and yes the can or tube kinda pops a little when you take the label off. Hope you're amused. Leave me a review.


	6. Chapter 6

AN: Thanks for reading, no beta still. let's all have a moment for the fallen crescent rolls. XD

Edit* when i posted I didn't realize I left out a few pages till I saw the previous chapter. So here it is, re uploaded because there are a few things that were left out. I can't believe I missed those pages. There's a Bexx and Caroline confrontation and an explanation on who Bexx really is.

* * *

Caroline was walking back into the apartment with Damon holding both bags of groceries behind her. Chicken was changing the channel and duck was quacking at him. Damon kicked the door shut and put the bags on the counter.

"I hope you're happy with yourself" Damon said

"Forget about the stupid crescent rolls!" Caroline yelled

"No! They were just an innocent bystander! How could you do that to the crescent rolls!? What did they do to you!?"

"We can get more crescent rolls, it's not like they blew up the crescent roll factory!"

"Never say that!"

"Really Damon? All you can go on about is stupid crescent rolls!?"

"It was pretty funny what you did to Klaus"

"You're so not helping"

"As much as I don't like Klaus, cause he's a dick, those crescent rolls didn't deserve to get punched like that"

"Damon! Can you just stop for a second!? I just caught him with another girl! God she's like teenager!"

"It's not what you think"

"What?! Is this some guy code? He was all over her! He was way into her personal space! He has a thing for blondes doesn't he? That's why he went after me, he has a thing for them!"

"Blondie, stop"

"He didn't even care what I had to say, I was just blonde and fit his type"

"Actually he has a thing for brunettes"

"I can't believe I fell for it! Who does he think he is!? I'm gonna tell him off once and for all!"

"Leave the crescent rolls!"

Caroline stormed out of the apartment, slamming the door. Damon looked over at duck and chicken.

"Yeah, she's gonna be back, and she's in for a surprise" Damon said

Duck and chicken looked at him questioning him.

"She didn't let me get a word in!"

* * *

Klaus sat on his couch with an ice pack on his shorts. Rebekah was in his kitchen looking for ice cream. Kol was pouring himself and Klaus a drink. He handed the drink to Klaus and sat next to him.

"I must say that was a very entertaining dinner" Kol said

"Shut up Kol" Klaus said taking a sip

"your blonde friend was very upset with you, and very vindictive it seems"

"I don't know where that came from"

"But it has thoroughly distracted our sister for the time being"

"Honestly how do you live like this? There's no food in here" Rebekah said

"There's plenty of food in there" Klaus said

"Plenty of bacon, sausage, ham, eggs and alcohol" Rebekah said

"I fail to see the problem" Klaus said

"The problem is-"

The doorbell rang. The three of them looked at the door.

"Did you order pizza?" Klaus asked

"No, but I should have" Kol said

"No, don't move, I'll get it" Rebekah said

"I am injured here!" Klaus said

Rebekah opened the door and there stood Caroline. Caroline who's hair was still messy and had flour in it.

"You!" Caroline hissed

"What the hell are you doing here?" Rebekah asked

"This sounds interesting" Kol jumped up and went to the door

Klaus looked over and saw Caroline standing in the doorway. He struggled to get up.

"He has the nerve to bring you here?! I'm going to kill him!" Caroline yelled

"You will do no such thing! I don't know who the hell you think you are, but you are leaving now!"

"Shut up you slut!"

"I will pull out your badly bleached hair and break your neck with my stilettos if you dare step into this apartment!"

"You dirty little skank! What are you 17? Is that a bit young to be slutting it up with someone way older than you?! And I'm a real blonde unlike you!"

"She's a real blonde" Kol added

"Shut up!" they both yelled at Kol

"My brother's a cop and my other brother's a lawyer, and they'll have no problem arresting you and making sure you never come near Klaus again!"

"Well you can have him and his cheating ass! Damon was right about you, are you dick!" Caroline yelled

"What did you do to piss her off Nik?" Kol asked

"No one talks about my brother like that!" Rebekah yelled back

"Brother?" Caroline asked

"You really are blonde aren' t you?" Rebekah asked

"You just said your brother was a cop or lawyer"

"Yes, I have 4 older brothers. One's a cop, one's a lawyer, and Kol who's completely useless, and Nik who's completely stupid"

"Oh my god!"

"Caroline" Klaus called out

Caroline looked over and saw Klaus standing there holding an ice pack on his crotch.

"Oh my god!" Caroline yelled as she ran off

"Well she's a keeper" Rebekah said closing the door

* * *

Caroline returned to her apartment to find the kitchen a mess, duck and chicken no where to be found.

"Damon!" Caroline yelled

She ran through the apartment looking for him and found him in the bathroom, taking a bubble bath. Duck was in the tub while chicken was standing by. Damon had a tray of pigs in a blanket in his hand and was eating them.

"DAMON! How could you not tell me it was his sister?!" Caroline yelled

"You're scaring duck and chicken with the yelling" Damon said

"You knew! You knew this entire time and didn't say anything!"

"You wouldn't let me say anything! You were hellbent on yelling at Klaus"

"All you could go on about were those stupid crescent rolls!"

"You weren't listening, I was trying to tell you!"

"You should have tried harder! Now he thinks I'm crazy! And his family hates me! This is all your fault!"

"My fault?!"

"Stupid crescent rolls! You could have told me before I punched him in the groin!"  
"That was all you! You wanted to be angry at him! You wanted it to end with him because things were going along so great, because deep down you can't handle being with someone!"

Caroline grabbed the tray of pigs in a blanket and dropped them into the bath water. Then hit Damon on the head with it.

"My crescent rolls!" Damon reached into the water to save them

Caroline dropped the tray and went back to her room.

* * *

"I have to say that blonde spitfire was quite entertaining" Kol said jumping onto the couch

"Quite a temper on that one, where did you find her?" Rebekah asked sitting next to Klaus

"Quiet you two!" Klaus said

"His ego is bruised" Kol said

"More like his pride" Rebekah added

"I'm glad my suffering is amusing you" Klaus said

"Oh cmon, you're providing limitless entertainment here. Tell us about her" Kol said

"How did you meet her?" Rebekah asked

"Stefan" Klaus answered

"Stefan?" Rebekah asked

"HE dragged me to see his idiot brother Damon." Klaus said

"What does Damon have to do with this?" Kol asked

"She lives with him" Klaus answered

"Wait! She lives with Damon Salvatore? Notorious manwhore? And she's the one screaming about you cheating on her?" Rebekah asked

"They hate each other. Besides she had no place to go after her boyfriend kicked her out of his apartment" Klaus said

"She has a boyfriend?" Rebekah asked

"Ex boyfriend. Apparently, Damon's now ex girlfriend, left him for Caroline's now ex boyfriend. So she ended up living with Damon." Klaus said

"And is that all they're doing?" Kol asked

"She hates him, she's the complete opposite of him. She's always cleaning and organizing. She even managed to train the duck and the chicken to go in the corner" Klaus said

"Duck and chicken?" Rebekah asked

"Damon has a pet duck and chicken" Klaus said

"So they live together, and have pets together, and you're completely ok with this" Kol said

"Why wouldn't I be?" Klaus asked

"Because they're playing house together, and you're not invited" Kol said

* * *

Damon walked out of his room towards the kitchen. He could smell something being baked. He wasn't sure what it was. He saw Caroline there making pigs in a blanket. He stopped and duck and chicken walked over to him. Caroline put the new tray into the oven and took out the batch that was just done. She placed them on a plate and turned around..

"Hey" Caroline said uneasily

"Hi" Damon said hesitantly

"Peace offering" Caroline handing him the plate

"Are you going to hit me with that?" Damon asked

"No. I said peace offering"

"Ok" Damon reached for the plate and took it, "I have a duck and I'm not afraid to use it"

"I really screwed up with Klaus didn't I?" Caroline asked

"More like the blackhole of screw ups. That the light from earth would never really reach just how badly you screwed up"

"I'm destined to be alone with a million cats"

Duck and chicken flapped their wings in annoyance.

"Ok, I'll just live on a chicken and duck farm instead. Why do I always do this?"

"You basically accused him of cheating on you with his sister. I think you watch too much Game of Thrones"

"You know nothing Damon Salvatore!"

"Alright look, if and only if you want to try and save what's left of this, you should do some serious damage control."

"I'm too embarrassed to apologize. and I can't do it over the phone"

"You're going to have to do it in person. And wear something slutty, it'll distract him, a lot, that he'll forget that you punched him in the goods"

"Oh god! How am I going to apologize for that? he probably won't talk to me"

"Alright look, I didn't want to do this, but we're going to have to bring in the big guns"

"What?"

* * *

"Can I just say this is really weird for me?" Stefan said sitting on the couch while the duck and chicken stared at him

"Look, I wouldn't have called unless it was important" Damon said

"You never call" Stefan said

"I do, again when it's important" Damon said

"What is it?" Stefan asked, "Can you make them stop staring at me?"

"It's a free country, they can look at your funny hair if they want"

"Damon!"

"Blondie needs your help"

"With what?"

"With Klaus"

"What?"

"She may have accused him of cheating on her with his sister"

"What?! Wait, they're dating?!"

"No, I mean blondie was seeing Klaus, she kinda went crazy on him and punched him in the nuts"

"I am so not involved with this" Stefan said as he got up

"Look, I didn't know who else to call, you're like his bff aren't you? And she for some reason even though he's a dick, really likes him"

"Klaus doesn't date, are we talking about the same person here?"

"Yes, will you just help her? She doesn't know what to do"

"And what am I suppose to do?"

"You know the guy"

"He doesn't date, he doesn't stick around long enough, he sees women as disposable, this is the first I've heard of it"

"Are you serious? So you're saying he's like me but worse"

"A little blonder"

Damon groaned and then noticed that duck and chicken were gone. He turned around and looked for them. Stefan followed him. They went down the hallway into Caroline's room. They found her sitting in a large pile of clothes. Duck and chicken were standing next to her.

"Why did I do that? He'll never talk to me again. I don't know what to do. Why do I always do this? He was actually nice to me. I am destined to be alone on my duck and chicken farm aren't I? Maybe I should get a few cows too while I'm at it" Caroline said

Duck moved closer to Caroline and nudged his head into her side. She reached out and brushed the feathers on his head back.

"I really liked him. Guess you two will be the only guys in my life" Caroline said as she started to cry

Damon looked at Stefan who sighed in defeat.

"Hey, duck may like water but he's not a pillow" Damon said

"Go away" Caroline said

"I brought backup"

Caroline turned and saw Stefan standing there.

"Stefan?" Caroline said

"Fine I'll help"

* * *

Damon was going through the pile of clothes in Caroline's room. He held up a pair of black lacy boyshorts.

"Put this in the maybe pile" Damon threw it on the bed

"What are you doing?" Caroline said pushing him away from the pile of clothes

"I'm trying to help you here. Don't you have anything else distracting?"

"What?"

"You're going to apologize, this never happens to a guy, he'll want to remember it"

"What? Why?"

"He's not going to remember the apology, he'll remember what happens after. If you distract him long enough then you won't have to apologize"

Damon picked through the pile.

"Stop that!" Caroline yelled

"None of this will do. This is all girl next door, you need smoldering sex goddess. One look at what you're wearing will have him melting on the floor like a pile of goo"

"How do you know he's even going to let me through the door?"

"Oh he will. Stefan took care of that. We have to make ice cubes"

"What?"

"Cmon blondie you're wasting time"

Damon grabbed her hand and led her into the kitchen. Duck was swimming in his pool and chicken was kicking sand around in his sandbox.

"Why are we making ice cubes?"

"We're making bacon ice cubes"

"Now is not the time to drink"

"It's not for me, it's for Klausy."

"Stefan knows what his favorite bottle of whiskey is. Show up with it, and he'll let you through the door. The bacon ice will just grease the wheels a bit more"

"What about his sister?"

"Stefan will make sure she's not there"

"Oh, you really thought this through. Is this what happens when you use all your brain power and concentrate on something?"

"Do you want my help or not?"

* * *

Kol and Rebekah were walking into a speciality liquor store. Kol walked up to the man at the counter. Rebekah was looking around bored. Kol had dragged her here in hopes of getting Klaus's favorite bottle of liquor. He was in a mood lately and Kol hoped it would snap him out of it.

"What do you mean you don't have any left?" Kol asked

"Someone bought the last bottle earlier. We won't have another shipment in until next week" the man said

"But I need this bottle, you don't understand, my brother has been brooding and moody and quite annoying."

"I'm sorry but it's not longer available"

"Can you at least tell me who bought it?"

"I'm afraid I can't do that"

Rebekah walked up and smiled at the man.

"what my brother is asking is, if we knew who bought the last bottle, then perhaps we could speak to them about it"

"We really don't release that kind of information"

"I won't say who told me" Rebekah flirted and placed her hand on his

"Well, he's a regular here, Stefan Salvatore" the man said

"Stefan?" Rebekah said

"Looks like he had the same idea as us"

* * *

"Damon is this really necessary?!" Caroline yelled while being dragged

"Hey, we have to bring out the big guns for this" Damon said while pulling her along

"What are we doing here?" Caroline said looking at the store they stopped in front of

"No man can resist this" Damon said

"Are you sure?"

"Trust me" Damon pulled her inside the store

Elena stood by the corner with her mouth open at what she saw. Damon taking Caroline into the expensive lingerie store. She needed a few minutes to process what happened. They were living together, they had pets together and now they were going shopping for sexy lingerie? Elena marched into the store. She looked around and a salesgirl came up to her.

"Do you need help with something?" she asked

"I'm just looking" Elena answered

She walked around the store and walked towards the dressing rooms. She saw Damon standing outside the door. She hid behind some silk robes and listened in on them.

"Oh open up Blondie!" Damon said

"Where's the rest of this? This can't be it" Caroline said

"Open up and I'll tell you"

"No!"

"I'm going to see it anyway, what's the big deal?"

"Damon!"

"I'll tell you if it's smoldering sexy goddess or not. Do you really want to be the sweet girl next door? That victoria's secret stuff isn't going to cut it. Cmon change is good. Let me see"

"Pervert!"

"Hey, no one forced you to come here, you came along willingly. Here I'll throw a dollar at you if it makes you feel better"

"Don't laugh ok?"

The door lock clicked and Damon opened the door and took a step inside. Elena walked down to the dressing room and then went into the dressing room next to theirs. She was trying to hear what they were saying.

"I see that yoga class is paying off blondie" Damon said

"Shut up!"

"The green looks good, makes you look blonder, but this isn't the one. You need a little more omph. Try the other one on"

"Did you pick these out?"

"No, I know the salesgirl here, she's wicked good. Look this one has bows on it"

"Get out!"

"This looks like a butterfly on the back"

"Get out!"

* * *

Rebekah and Kol were walking back when they saw Damon and Caroline walk out of the lingerie store. They both stopped and watched them walk out of the store together. Caroline was holding the bag and Damon was trying to peek inside. She slapped his hand away and he pouted.

"Isn't that…" Kol started to say

"That crazy blonde" Rebekah finished

"Moving on so soon with Damon of all people?" Kol said

"Didn't take her that long it seems"

"But Damon Salvatore of all people?"

"He's better off without her. She was completely crazy, screaming and running in there attacking Nik like that"

"But the crazy ones are always the fun ones"

* * *

"Are you sure this is going to work?" Caroline said putting her jacket on

"Yes, just stick to the plan" Damon said

Duck and chicken looked at her and quacked and clucked at her. Damon took out her long trench coat and threw it at her.

"Wear this one instead" Damon said

"Why?"

"Men are visual creatures, we want to unwrap the present. Don't show it all now"

"You just said I had to distract him"

"The booze will get you through the door, just show him a little skin at first then the rest."

"Are you sure this is going to work?"

"He's a man, it'll work. Did you shave your legs?"

"Yes"

"You get waxed?"

"Yes"

"Perfume?"

"Yes"

"Did you use that flavored body powder?"

"Yes, and where did you even find that?"

"I have my ways, now take your basket of goodies, and go get your big bad"

"If he rejects me-"

"He won't!"

"If he does, you're cleaning up after duck and chicken for 2 weeks"

"Fine whatever, he won't. If I'm right you won't be back for days, and you'll be walking funny"

"Damon!"

"Remember to drink water, hydrate, and use protection"

Caroline grabbed the basket and headed towards the door.

"Make us proud!" Damon said

Duck and chicken were clucking and quacking along. Caroline opened the door and saw Elena standing there.

"I'll see you guys later" Caroline said walking past Elena

Damon walked to the door and saw Elena there. He ignored her and waved good bye to Caroline.

"I want details!" Damon yelled

Duck and chicken stood by the door.

"What do you want?" Damon asked

"I saw you two at the store" elena said

"You know I like crescent rolls"

"Not that store. I saw you two at that store. You were helping her try on lingerie"

Damon didn't have a response for that. He was surprised that Elena followed him like that.

"You're stalking me!?"

"I wasn't, I was in the area and saw you with her. Are you together now?"

"Why do you even care? You left me remember?"

"Why are you with her?"

"Why do you care?"

"She's my friend"

"Some friend you are, hooking up with her boyfriend, then kicking her out of her apartment. With friends like you who needs enemies?"

"Damon"

"You're jealous. You're jealous of the fact that we're both happy and we don't need you in our lives. You can't stand the fact that we've both moved on, that i'm not pining away after you. You really are something you know that?"

"I had feelings for both of you, and I didn't want to choose"

"Well you did, now live with it" Damon said as he slammed the door shut

Duck quacked at him and chicken flapped its wings.

"Let's take a bath, chicken you should learn how to swim" Damon said

* * *

Klaus threw the glass against the wall, watching it shatter into pieces. The amber liquid slid down the wall onto the floor.

"Are you certain?" Klaus asked

"We saw them walk out of the lingerie shop together" Rebekah said

"Him of all people in the world?" Klaus said

"Sorry brother, I saw it too" Kol said

Klaus placed his hands on the kitchen counter and looked down. His entire body was tense and hearing the news that Caroline was now with Damon sent him over the edge.

"That pompous, arrogant, self absorbed little twit! She choose him?! HIM?!" Klaus yelled

"Let's go have a drink" Kol said

The door bell rang and Rebekah went to answer it. Stefan was standing there smiling.

"Hey, Klaus here?" Stefan asked

"Yes, he's in a mood again" Rebekah said

Stefan walked in and saw Klaus and Kol standing in the kitchen.

"Hey, you look moody again" Stefan said

"Your idiot brother is the cause of it" Klaus said

"What he do now?"

"He's with Caroline" Klaus said

"They live together" Stefan said

"We saw her walking out of some expensive lingerie store together" Kol said

"You what?" Stefan asked

"She's a trollop, and now she's with your brother" Rebekah said

"That's not what happened" Stefan said

"How would you know?" Rebekah asked

"I'm having a bottle of your favorite whiskey delivered, it should be here soon. Kol, Rebekah help me get something to eat and we'll bring it back here" Stefan said

"I'd rather go out" Klaus said

"Ok, but they delivery guy should be here soon. I just want to get a snack" Stefan said

"Go ahead" Kol said

Stefan rubbed the back of his neck. This was not the way it was suppose to go.

"Rebekah help me with the order. They always get it wrong" Stefan said

"Alright, they are quite dumb over there" Rebekah said grabbing her jacket

Stefan looked at Kol and tilted his head towards the door. Kol picked up on it and didn't understand.

"Don't leave me with your sister" Stefan whispered

Kol laughed and picked up his phone.

"Alright" Kol said

"We'll be back in a few minutes" Rebekah said

Stefan looked at Klaus as Kol and Rebekah walked out.

"Don't bite the delivery guy's head off" Stefan said closing the door

* * *

Caroline walked out of the elevator and towards Klaus's apartment. She was nervous and afraid. He could very well just slam the door in her face. She did act like a lunatic. Clutching the basket closer to her she walked to his door. She pushed her curls out of her face, that had fallen out of the bun and rang the door bell. She felt like a perverse red riding hood holding a basket of goodies, and the way she was dressed.

"About bloody time!" Klaus said throwing the door open

Klaus was expecting the delivery guy not Caroline. She stood there wearing a tan trench coat, holding a wicker basket. Her hair was curls and put up in a bun and her lips were a dark plum color making her skin look even paler.

"Hi," Caroline said as she reached into her basket, pulling out a bottle, "Peace offering?"

Klaus recognized the bottle immediately. So Stefan had a hand in this. He moved out of the way and let her walk in. She placed the bottle on the kitchen counter and went to get glasses from the cupboard. Klaus watched her as she moved in his kitchen. Her heels clicked on his tiles as she moved about. He wondered what she was doing here. She took out a round blue sphere out of the basket and opened it. Inside was a spherical ice cube. She placed it in the glass and poured the whiskey in. She handed him the glass. He took it and wondered what the sphere was. He took a sip and smiled.

"Bacon?" Klaus asked

"Surprise, hope you like it"

"I do"

Caroline put the other spherical ice cube in another glass and poured in more whiskey.

"What else do you have in that basket?" Klaus asked

"Wouldn't you like to know"

"What are you doing here love?"

"I came here to apologize for the way I acted"

"Really?"

"It's hot in here, do you mind if I take my coat off?" Caroline pulled at the belt of her trenchcoat

Klaus took another sip and watched as her coat came off, revealing the red satin dress she had on. It was short and a bit boxy. It did nothing to accentuate her body. Klaus wondered why she was wearing it. He noticed it was a halter dress that tied in the back with a large bow. She walked closer towards him and pulled her hair out of the bun, letting her hair fall freely.

"I'm sorry for being crazy and yelling at you. And for punching you in the nuts" Caroline said

"It did hurt" Klaus said

"Do you want me to kiss it and make it feel better?"

Caroline pulled the giant bow on the back of her neck, releasing the dress she was wearing. The fabric pooled at her feet. Klaus's eyes were about to fall out of his head when he saw what she was wearing underneath it. It was black fabric that barely covered her body. He dropped his glass and it shattered on the floor. She turned around and reached for the other glass she had poured. Klaus saw the back of what she was wearing and all the blood left his brain, his hands, his legs, he couldn't move. She turned back and handed him another glass. He took it and gulped down all the liquid inside and placed it on the counter.

"Do you want some more?" Caroline asked

Klaus grabbed her and kissed her frantically. She was driving him insane. Walking in here dressed like that, teasing him, taunting him, offering him his favorite whiskey and then herself. He couldn't think clearly. He could only feel her warm body pressed up against his, how soft her skin was, how sweet she tasted. He lifted her up, feeling her legs wrap around his waist and carried her to his bedroom.

* * *

"I thought we were getting it to go" Rebekah said

"Take a seat we're going to be here awhile" Stefan said

"What's going on?" Rebekah asked

"Stefan here sent out brother a little present" Kol said sitting down at the table

"You sent Nik a prostitute?!" Rebekah asked

"No! Just give them a few hours, that should be enough for a 7 course meal" Stefan said

"Hardly, 7 courses would take more than a few hours" Rebekah said

"Well then, good thing we have time" Stefan said

* * *

Damon was sitting on the couch watching cartoons with duck and chicken. Donald duck was running through disney land and knocking the mickey mouse dolls aside. Damon started laughing.

"Donald knows what's up" Damon said

There was a knock at the door and Damon went up to get it.

"don't change the channel you two" Damon said

Damon opened the door and there was a woman standing there who looked annoyed.

"Do I know you?" Damon asked

"Could you not play your tv that loud?!"

"I could, but why would I?"

Duck quacked at her and flapped its wings.

"Yeah not happening" Damon said

"You have a duck?" the woman asked

"And a chicken" Damon said

* * *

If you're wondering Damon took Caroline to Agent Provocateur. And what she's wearing can be seen here. on my tumblr etherealprey. tumblr dot com / post / 69815234618 just take out the spaces. I got the idea for the dark plum from Candice's appearance on the craig ferguson show, she looked really good there. So I kinda went with that.

Are you surprised at Elena's jealousy? Who do you think would attack her first? Duck or chicken? Donald pushing the mickey mouse dolls aside was something i saw on tumblr. I figure Damon would like that. Leave me a review. Duck & chicken will be back next chapter!


	7. Chapter 7

AN: Here's another chapter. Thank you for reading, no beta still.

* * *

Stefan, Kol and Rebekah were walking out of the restaurant.

"I don't think I could another bite!" Kol said

"Considering you ate my plate too" Rebekah said

"Sharing is caring Bexx" Kol said

"Come on, I'll take you home" Stefan said

"No, she doesn't want to go home" Kol said

"What?" Rebekah asked

"You're coming with me, I'm not leaving you alone" Kol said

"I will not be staying with you in that thing you call an apartment" Rebekah hissed

"Fine I'll stay with you" Kol offered

"I'm not a child"

"Then stop acting like a brat then!"

"Stop it you two! Rebekah, I heard what happened, and your brother is just trying to help you. And Kol, dial it down a notch" Stefan said

"I want to see what Nik is doing" Rebekah said

"No you don't! He's probably doing vile, perverse things to that blonde girl, things that would get him arrested in most states" Kol said

"Shut up!" Rebekah yelled

"And if she's limping at the end, then I'm going to give him a big pat on the back" Kol said

"I'm going to be sick!" Rebekah said

* * *

Caroline opened her eyes slowly. She was exhausted and looked around the room. She was in Klaus's room. She saw a glass of water on the table next to her and reached for it. She moved and her body felt incredibly sore. She shifted and sat up and felt it throbbing. She gulped down the water and looked over at Klaus who was sleeping with a smile on his face. He looked almost angelic the way he slept, even though their previous night's events would tell another story. She looked around the room and saw clothes thrown about the room. She saw pieces of what she wore scattered about. She reached into her hair and realized it was big and puffy and must have resembled a bird's nest. She moved and swung her legs off the bed. Her feet touched the plush carpet and she could feel how sore she still was. She was about to move when she felt an arm wrap around her waist and pull her back into bed. She squealed as she felt the sheets against her back and Klaus's body pressed against hers.

"Morning love, going somewhere?" Klaus asked as his hands skimmed along her sides

"Aren't you tired?"

"I slept quite well last night, didn't you?"

"I did, until someone kept waking me up"

"I didn't hear you complain, in fact all I heard was you-"

Caroline covered his mouth before he could finish. Klaus had a devilish glint in his eye. He slid down her body, trailing kisses on his way down, past her breasts, to her belly button and then lower.

"No, no, no! Stop!" Caroline yelled

"What's wrong?" Klaus said as his head popped back up

"I'm just really sore"

"Shall I kiss it and make it better?"

"How are you not sore?"

"Did I really hurt it?"

"Yes"

"But to be fair, you did hurt mine too"

"And I thought I made up for it"

"You did, now let me make it up to you"

* * *

Duck and chicken were in the kitchen eating when they heard someone walking. They stopped and looked up. They saw a woman, holding her shoes walking towards the door. The woman stopped and looked at duck and chicken. Chicken flapped its wings and shooed the woman away. The woman shrieked and ran out of the apartment. A few minutes later Damon walked out and saw duck and chicken staring at him.

"What?" Damon asked

Chicken clucked at him, and then duck.

"She left! What I can't have a social life?"

Duck and chicken turned back to their food and started eating again.

"Hey, don't be all judgey on me. I know her name, I think. She lives above us or below us, I can't remember. Besides it's all your fault duck, you and your stupid cartoons"

* * *

Caroline leaned back into the bathtub which could have easily fit 4 people. Yet she decided to lean against his chest, feeling his hands massaging her shoulders.

"That feels good" Caroline said

Klaus leaned in and kissed her on her neck.

"Your tub is huge. I don't even have to share it with Duck"

"You're not bringing your duck here"

"He's not my duck, he's Damon's duck"

"Either way I have you all to myself, and I'm not sharing you with anyone"

"Are you jealous of duck?"

"Course not he's a duck"

"He can be quite dashing when he wants to be, him and chicken"

"I never thought of you agreeing to a threesome"

Caroline laughed and turned around to straddle Klaus's lap.

"You shouldn't be jealous of them. You have nothing to worry about"

"And what about Damon?"

"Damon?"

"Yes, Damon"

"I live with him because I got kicked out of my apartment. Besides he needs someone to keep duck and chicken in line"

"Is that that why you went lingerie shopping with him?"

"You were spying on me?"

"No, Rebekah saw you leave the store together"

"You mean your sister? He's the one who dragged me there. He said that I needed to bring out the big guns if you were going to forgive me"

"Did he see you in it?"

"Are you jealous of Damon?"

"Of course not"

"It was his idea to do all this for you. The whiskey, the bacon fat ice cube, the sexy lingerie, the trench coat. It was all for you"

"Me?"

"Cause I really like you, and I didn't want to screw things up, but it looks like I already did"

"No, just a misunderstanding. Though my sister is far too young in age to be mistaken for a girlfriend. I do have standards"

"And just what are those standards?"

"Let me show you"

* * *

Damon was holding chicken and putting him in a new nest. It was a nest placed inside half a giant clear egg. Chicken did not want to sit on the nest and started flapping its wings.

"Ok, I get it, you don't like the egg, even though you came from one" Damon said

The apartment door opened and Caroline walked in. Damon looked at her as she closed the door. She took her heels off and held them in her hands.

"What?" Caroline asked

"Where's the basket?" Damon asked

"I forgot it on the counter!"

"You're not limping which means he didn't do his job"

"Damon!"

"Just saying. You've been gone for 2 days, I'm surprised you can still walk"

"I am incredibly sore if that makes you feel better"

"Good job blondie, you made him into a man finally"

* * *

Caroline heard the doorbell ringing repeatedly and got out of bed. She wondered who was there so early. Then she looked at the clock and realized it was close to noon. She walked to the door and opened it. It was a woman standing there, fuming mad.

"Can I help you?" Caroline asked

"Where is he!?"

"I don't know who you are, but it's way too early for this" Caroline said as she started to close the door

"No! Don't close the door on me!" the woman screamed as she pushed the door

"Who the hell are you?" Caroline yelled

"I'm Andi! I live above this apartment!"

"Ok Andi, I'm Caroline and I live here, bye now"

"No! Where's Damon!?"

"Not here"

"Doesn't he live here?"

"Sometimes"

"Are you his girlfriend?"

"God no! You need to leave!"

Caroline pushed the door harder and closed it. She locked the door and turned around to go back to bed. There was more banging on the door.

"Damon, what the hell did you do to this girl?" Caroline said

There was another knock on the door. Caroline groaned, she was tired and all she wanted was to sleep in.

"What the hell!?" Caroline opene the door

"Hello sweetheart" Klaus smiled

"Oh, hi" Caroline said moving aside

Klaus was holding a large bouquet of flowers in a glass vase. There were brightly colored orchids, some flowers she had never seen before. Klaus walked in and then Andi ran into the apartment. Klaus looked at the woman who ran past him.

"What the? Get back here!" Caroline yelled

Andi ran into Damon's room, which was completely messy but Damon was no where to be found.

"Where is he?!" Andi yelled

"I don't know! I'm not his mom! And you need to leave!" Caroline yelled

"He said we had a connection"

"Oh god, you believed that?"

"He said I was different from the other girls"

"You're better off without him. He's messy, and bossy, and completely inappropriate at times" Caroline said

"I have the worst taste in men"

"You're not the only one. Cmon"

Andi followed Caroline back out into the living room. Klaus set the vase of flowers on the counter in the kitchen.

"Sorry about that, I'm usually not like this" Andi said

"I know, Damon has that effect on people"

"I'm sorry. You must think I'm a crazy person"

"It's ok. Really" Caroline said

Caroline looked around and noticed that duck and chicken weren't in the pool or sandbox or coop. She also noticed they weren't in Damon's room either.

"Well I need to use the bathroom, so I'll see you around" Caroline said as she went to the bathroom

She opened the door and saw Damon sitting in the bathtub with duck and chicken standing on the closed toilet seat. She saw that he was playing tic tac toe with chicken. Caroline closed the door and walked over to Damon.

"What the hell Damon? What did you do to our neighbor? She went crazy and ran in here" Caroline said in a whisper

"I'm not here" Damon whispered back

"You could have at least given me a warning"

"I didn't know she was gonna be back"

"You always know, that was so awkward!"

"Well you got rid of her"

"I should just tell her you're here!"

"No!"

"Caroline, are you alright in there?" Klaus asked

"Yes! Fine!" Caroline answered

Damon had ducked his head under the water to hide. He lifted himself out and wiped the bubbles from his eyes.

"You can't hide in here forever!" Caroline whispered

"You said she was going to leave" Damon whispered back

"Caroline? I'm really sorry for what happened" Andi said

"She's still here?" Damon whispered

"Just talk to her"

"No"

"Damon"

"Caroline are you ok?" Andi asked

"Hide me" Damon sank below the water again

"Get out of there" Caroline whispered

Caroline reached into the water to pull Damon out. Duck started quacking and getting upset.

"Quiet Duck, you're not helping" Caroline said

Duck flapped its wings more. Chicken started to get upset as well. He started clucking louder. Caroline struggled with Damon who was still hiding in the water.

"I should just drown you instead" Caroline said

Damon popped his head above the water and narrowed his eyes.

"I'd like to see you try Blondie" Damon said

Damon grabbed onto Caroline's shoulders and pulled her into the tub. Caroline screamed as she hit the water. The water splashed out of the tub, pushing duck onto the floor. Both chicken and duck were making loud noises.

"What the bloody hell?" Klaus said as he tried to open the door

Damon moved and helped Caroline stand in the tub. Klaus opened the door and saw the two of them standing there dripping wet. Damon was naked. Caroline's pajamas became very transparent, and Klaus could tell she wasn't wearing a bra.

"You jerk! You were hiding in here the whole time!" Andi yelled

Damon grabbed Caroline and held her in front of him as a shield.

"What is she your girlfriend!?" Andi yelled

Damon grabbed chicken and held him out towards Andi.

"Protect me chicken!" Damon said

Chicken clucked and flapped its wings.

"Get that thing out of my face!" Andi yelled

"Duck get rid of her!" Damon said

Duck quacked and started walking towards Andi.

"You're a jerk you know that!?" Andi said as she ran off

"Good job duck" Damon said

Klaus grabbed a towel and threw it Caroline. He turned and walked away. Caroline wrapped herself with the towel when she realized everything was visible and she ran after Klaus.

"Klaus! Wait!" Caroline yelled

"What is it?"

"Don't go"

"Why?"

"Why did you come here?"

"I came here to see if you were alright, maybe if you wanted lunch, clearly you're busy" Klaus tried to open the door to leave

"I'm not busy! I'm just surprised, and wet. And that didn't come out right"

"I'm leaving"

"No, please, don't"

"Why should I stay? So I can watch you two play house together?"

"What?"

"Why is it perfectly ok for you to see him naked and not be phased by it? Is this a natural occurrence?"

"No! Nothing's going on, we just live together"

"And you just walk in on him while he's taking a bath? Does he do the same for you?"

"NO! Well when Duck's in there he goes in to check on him"

"So he's seen you naked?!"

"No!"

"What exactly is the nature of your relationship with him then?"

"We just live together, nothing's going on"

"Right, I'm not a fool Caroline"

"You're being silly"

"Am I?! You're parading around here with barely anything on, you walk in on each other in the bath, is there anything you don't do together?!"

"I don't parade!"

"Is that all you heard?!"

"Damon's my friend! We're roommates! He's the one who told me how to apologize to you! He helped me get the whiskey, and the bacon ice cube and the overpriced lingerie that you ripped to shreds! Why can't you believe that there's nothing going on!"

"You never answered my question"

"What?"

"Did he see you in it?!"

"Yes"

Klaus opened the door and walked out. He would regret anything else he would have said or done after. Caroline pulled the towel around herself tighter and closed the door. Damon walked out in a bathrobe with yellow duckies on it.

"What I miss?" Damon asked

* * *

Hope you were amused. Clearly Damon ships himself with everyone. He has no loyalty at all.


	8. Chapter 8

AN: Thank you all for reading. hope you are amused. no beta still. see you at the bottom. hope you all have a happy holiday!

* * *

"Why am I involved in this again?" Stefan asked as he sat on the couch

"I wouldn't ask you if I didn't have to" Damon said

"Look, I helped you the first time, the only time, maybe these two aren't meant to be"

"No, I refuse to believe that"

"Aren't you always saying Klaus is a dick?"

"Yeah he is, he's gonna be a even bigger one if he does this to her"

"I am so not involved"

"What is wrong with him? Besides the obvious?"

"Look I already told you, he doesn't do relationships, maybe it ran its course"

"No, he was sweet on her, he brought her flowers, he never does that"

"Ok fine, but he doesn't date. He doesn't see the same woman twice"

"Find out why"

"I already know why"

"Then why is he being like this to blondie?"

"I don't want to be here! This isn't my business!"

"Stefan!"

"Why can't you just let them two work it out?"

"Cause they're stupid that's why! Klaus is a dick and blondie's a control freak"

"Which is all the reason NOT to be involved"

"At least tell her why he's like this"

"It's not my story to tell"

"Why not?" Caroline asked

The two brothers turned around and saw Caroline standing there in her fuzzy bathrobe with jellybeans on it and matching slippers.

"Cause it's his story not mine" Stefan said

"Well he's not going to tell me anytime soon" Caroline said

"Look, Klaus doesn't do relationships, I was surprised when Damon told me he was seeing you"

"Was"

"Whatever, the fact that he stuck around is something he never does"

"So what happened?"

"Damon happened"

"How am I involved?" Damon asked

"You're in the wrong place at the wrong time. It looks like you two are together" Stefan said

"Ew" Caroline said

"Gross" Damon said

"Cmon, Damon has no boundaries, no concept of personal space, he's seen you in sexy lingerie that was meant for Klaus. And then Klaus walks in on both of you in the bathtub dripping wet, and Damon's naked? What is he suppose to think?" Stefan said

"He's suppose to trust me!" Caroline said

"He can't!"

"Why the hell not?!"

"Because he can't!" Stefan stopped himself from saying anything else

"Go on" Caroline said

"I'm going to go take a bath" Damon said disappearing

"If I tell you, you have to swear to me you will not tell him I told you. He will kill me"

"And you say girls are dramatic"

"I'm serious"

"fine"

"A long time ago, Klaus wasn't always like this. There was a girl"

"Course there was a girl"

"Do you want me to tell you or not?"

"fine, there was a girl"

"Not just any girl, this girl made him fall in love with her"

* * *

Damon barged into Klaus's office. Klaus looked up from his desk.

"What are you doing here? I'm busy" Klaus said

"Your secretary didn't put up much of a fight, then again she's waiting for you to bend her over her desk and tell her she's been naughty and spank her"

"Did you really come here to annoy me? Some of us have work to do"

"Work? I still don't know what you do here"

Klaus got up and walked around his desk.

"I work unlike some people, I don't get the luxury of living off my father's money"

"Daddy issues. And I'm surprised you haven't banged your secretary yet, I figure you would have hit that at least once"

"Get out"

"Still mad I see, you should try yoga, or drink some chamomile tea. Don't you Brits like tea?" Damon said as he walked over to Klaus's phone

"What are you doing?"

Damon pressed a few buttons before finding the one that paged his secretary.

"Yes Klaus?" a woman's voice answered

"Can you bring us some tea? Chamomile?" Damon asked

"We don't have any"

"Well, you can go out and get some. You can get yourself one too. Thanks…" Damon said as he looked at Klaus

"Greta" Klaus said

"Yes, thanks Greta" Damon said as he sat down in the Klaus's chair

"Are you done annoying me now?"

"No" Damon said as he put his feet on the table

"Do I have to call Stefan?"

"This doesn't concern him, this is about Blondie"

Klaus closed his eyes and tried to remain calm.

"Get out" Klaus said

"You know you really are a dick. And I have no idea why she even likes you. She can do so much better"

"Like you?"

"Me? I'm not even on the table. But Greta is, she's all ready to-"

"Damon shut up!"

"Fine if you're not gonna bang Greta, I will"

"Get out!"

"You're a dick, a total dick"

"You've said that repeatedly"

"Well maybe if you stop being one I'll stop"

"Do I have to call security?"

"I already bribed them with donuts. Great bakery in the city, amazing donuts. Anyways I'm just here to clear up a few things, like stop being a dick to Caroline"

"Why do you even care?"

"She's my friend"

"Oh she's your friend"

"Yeah, she's my friend, she's my roommate"

"I thought you two hated each other. You said she was Martha Stewart on crack"

"She is, have you seen her in the kitchen? The way she labels everything, ugh, she's a human label maker"

"Are you done?"

"Nope," Damon said as he put his feet back on the floor, "We're going to clear a few things up right now"

"Like what?"

"Like the fact that you are and always will be a dick, but you're not allowed to be one to her, she doesn't deserve this, to be treated like this. She's been through a lot, and if you're just emotionally unavailable then man up" Damon said making the air quotes

"Why do you care what happens between us?"

"You said us! That means you do care about her"

"This is none of your business!"

"It is when you're a dick to her! Not the kind that she rides of course"

"GET OUT!"

"She's a good person and doesn't deserve to be treated like this. You have trust issues, but if you can't trust her, then you might as well just hole up in some bomb shelter and die then. She's totally into you for some unexplainable reason. I mean you're a dick, but you didn't try to change her. She always sings and dances after she sees you. It's because you make her happy"

Klaus was about to yell at Damon when he stopped. The thought of Caroline happy, singing and dancing made him smile. Klaus realized he was smiling and immediately stopped.

"She has that effect on you." Damon said

Klaus cleared his throat.

"It doesn't matter now"

"Why the hell not?!"

There was a knock on the door and Greta walked in with a tray of tea. Greta walked over to Klaus's desk, flashing him a smile before setting the tray on his table. Damon was letting his eyes roam all over her body.

"Is there anything else you need Klaus?" Greta asked

"That will be all" Klaus said

Geta walked out and closed the door.

"How have you not hit that yet?" Damon asked

"She works for me, she's a rather good assistant"

"Right"

"How does Caroline even tolerate you?"

"Let me break this down for you. Caroline is in the ew pile. That is, I feel no attraction for her, she might as well be my awkward cousin that I'm forced to talk to. That time she saw me naked, she wanted to throw up, repeatedly. And even though I too am a manwhore like you, when I see her in her underwear I have no desire to bend her over this desk like I do with Greta"

"I didn't need the visual"

"Seriously, how have you not hit that? How long has she been working under you?"

"Not everything is about sex"

"Lies, you can't BS me. Since you're not going to, I'm going to see if Greta wants to have some fun"

* * *

Caroline was picking a few things at the supermarket. She threw in some crescent rolls into her basket. She saw a pint of chocolate ice cream and then red velvet ice cream. She took both and threw them into her basket. She was heading to the registers when she heard familiar voices.

"I mean she's living with him now. I don't understand why him of all people" Elena said

"Where did you think she'd go? Back to Mystic Falls? She made it a point that she wanted to stay here and not go back" Matt said

"But she's with him now"

"You just said they were living together"

"I mean they're together together now"

"Why do you even care Elena?"

"I mean it's not like her to just move on like that. You dated her for like 2 years"

"Yeah and I decided that I wanted to be with you. You're not having second thoughts now?"

"No, it's just really weird for her, I'm just concerned for her that's all"

"You sure it's not Damon you're concerned about?"

"Matt!"

Caroline decided to rush to the registers and pay for her things and go home. She placed her things on belt and hoped no one saw her.

"Hey Care" Matt said from behind

Caroline froze. She turned around slowly.

"Hey" Caroline said

"You look good" Matt said

"Yeah, I do"

The cashier was scanning the items slowly. Caroline was hoping she could get out of there quickly.

"I heard you found a place to stay" Matt said

"Yeah, I did"

"Look I'm sorry about-"

"Don't, seriously don't"

"Alright"

Matt looked at the things she was buying and saw the crescent rolls.

"Since when did you eat these?" Matt asked

"I don't, they're for Damon"

"Since when do you buy stuff for Damon?"

"We live together"

"Are you two like together?"

"Why is everyone asking me that?! Look, it's none of your business what I do after you kicked me out for Elena. And Elena needs to stalk stalking Damon, it's creepy!"

"Elena's what?"

Caroline paid for her groceries and grabbed the bag and left. She didn't stop for anything and just wanted to get back home.

* * *

Damon was in the kitchen feeding duck and chicken. He was wearing his bathrobe with the yellow duckies on it. Greta walked out of his bedroom and into the living room. She saw Damon feeding a duck and chicken. She slipped her shoes on.

"So call me" Greta said picking up her coat and purse

"Maybe" Damon said

Caroline walked into the apartment and looked at Greta and then Damon. She closed the door and went into the kitchen. She unpacked the groceries and didn't say anything. She had a long day.

"Is that her?" Greta asked

"Yeah" Damon answered

Caroline looked at both of them.

"I can hear you" Caroline said

"I can see why he likes her" Greta said

"Caroline, Greta, Greta, Caroline. Greta's Klaus's assistant that he hasn't banged, though it wasn't for lack of trying" Damon said

"Some of us want to keep our jobs and not have a sexual harassment suit" Greta said

"That's what lawyers are for"

"Nice meeting you Caroline" Greta said as she left

"What was that?" Caroline asked

"That was Greta"

"Why are you banging his assistant?"

"I went to talk to him today, and Greta was there. And I don't know why he hasn't banged her. I mean if it weren't for you, I'd swear he was gay. Not that there's anything wrong with that"

"Damon!"

"I just had a talk with him, cleared the air"

"Did you punch each other?"

"No, I'm a lover, not a fighter. Anyways, cleared up a few things"

"And?"

"And what? I took Greta with me. What he does now is up to him"

* * *

Caroline was in the kitchen trying to make dinner. She did miss how Klaus would bring her dinner almost every night, mostly to torture Damon with a duck or chicken. She looked around for a pan for the lasagna she was trying to make. She found one and started to to get the ingredients out. Damon walked out and saw Caroline in the kitchen.

"You don't want to use that pan" Damon said

"Why?"

"Cause that's the pan I used when duck was throwing up caterpillars"

"EW! WHAT?!"

"He was throwing up green little caterpillars, but he stopped"

"When was this?"

"Yesterday"

"Why didn't you take him to the vet?!"

"I was going to, but he stopped"

"Damon! How could you!"

"We can take him now if you want. But he's fine. I think it's cause he ate that plant"

"Damon! How could you let him eat random things?!"

"Stop yelling! You're upsetting them!"

Caroline grabbed duck's blanket and wrapped him in it and picked him up.

"It's raining hard outside. Bring an umbrella" Damon said

Caroline put on her jacket and grabbed her umbrella as she ran out of the apartment.

"I can't believe Damon just let you throw up like that" Caroline said

* * *

The rain was pouring and pelting Caroline as she struggled to open her umbrella. She made it a few blocks before the wind blew her umbrella inside out. She struggled to hold onto duck and the umbrella. She had to let the umbrella go or drop duck. The umbrella flew away and Caroline watched it disappear. She held duck closer to her as she ran through the rain. She started to shiver as her clothes became soaked. Her shivering made duck nervous. He jumped out of her arms and started running down the street.

"Duck get back here!" Caroline yelled as she ran after him

Duck ran through the streets. Caroline was surprised that duck could run that fast. What was Damon feeding it? Duck ran through the ran and then stopped suddenly. Klaus stood there holding an umbrella waiting for a cab. He looked down and saw the white duck staring at him. Duck tilted his head and looked at Klaus.

"What are you doing here?" Klaus asked

"Duck! Duck get back here!" Caroline yelled

Caroline saw duck standing infront of someone holding a large umbrella. She couldn't see who it was. She ran and grabbed duck.

"Don't ever do that again!" Caroline said

Duck said nothing and looked at Klaus. Caroline looked up and realized the rain wasn't pelting her anymore. Klaus moved his umbrella to cover her.

"Hey" Caroline said

"Hi" Klaus said

Duck quacked to break the awkwardness.

"You shouldn't be out. The storm is coming and they're sending everyone home. I'll give you a ride home" Klaus said

Caroline nodded as the cab pulled up to the curb. Caroline got in with duck. Klaus got in after her. He gave the driver Caroline's address and they started driving. Caroline looked down at duck who seemed unphased by any of this.

"What were you doing out?" Klaus asked

"Duck was sick"

"He looks fine"

"He was sick, and it's a long story"

The driver stopped and informed them that the storm was causing flooding and the roads were being closed. Klaus gave the driver his address and told him to go there instead.

"You can wait it out at my place" Klaus said

Caroline cradled duck in her arms and just nodded. She was quiet when he led her into his building into the elevator and into his apartment. She saw the basket was still on the counter. She held duck close. Duck was very warm. She brushed his feathers back. Klaus took his jacket off along with his shoes.

"I'll try to find you something dry" Klaus said

Caroline looked around and saw a newspaper. She put the newspaper down on the kitchen floor and placed duck on the newspaper. Duck looked around. He was slowly inspecting the area.

"Be good" Caroline said

Caroline walked towards the bathroom. She squeezed the water out of her hair into the sink. She looked at herself and saw her make up was running down her face. She splashed more water on her face trying to wash it off. She reached for a towel and saw Klaus standing there holding one. He handed her the towel.

"Your duck was making noises, I went to see what he was doing" Klaus said

"Oh, sorry about that" Caroline said taking the towel and drying her face

"You know where my closet is. I'll make us some tea" Klaus said

Caroline walked into his room and towards his closet. She pulled out a shirt, a grey henley and peeled her wet clothes off. She pulled the shirt on and looked around for pants or shorts. She gave up and hung up her wet clothes in his bathroom. She walked out and saw duck walking around his living room. Duck was walking slowly, as if the floor was made of glass and was about to break at any second.

Klaus poured the hot water into the tea cups and took out another tea cup. He filled it with bottled water and placed it on the newspaper. Duck was too busy inspecting the area to notice. Caroline walked over to her purse and texted Damon so he wouldn't worry.

* * *

Damon was playing tic tac toe with chicken in the living room. He was watching cartoons when he saw the text. She didn't think anything of it and went back to chicken.

"You know you have to get good at this if you want to make any money" Damon said

Chicken clucked at him.

"You can't expect me to support you forever. Do you want to be a kept chicken?"

Chicken clucked and flapped its wings.

"Don't tell duck"

* * *

Caroline was taking a sip of her tea when Klaus walked out of his bedroom. He had changed into a t shirt and pajama pants. He saw Caroline leaning on the counter, her long legs stretched as she took a sip. He wanted nothing more than to take her on the counter like before. He shook that from his mind and went over to his couch and sat down. He turned on the tv in hopes of distracting himself.

Duck walked over to the tea cup on the floor. He took a sip of water and quacked in approval. He continued to walk around the apartment. Caroline watched duck hoping he wouldn't poo all over the place. She looked out the windows and saw the rain pouring down. Klaus's apartment always had huge windows, while Damon's had smaller windows. Just enough for the sun to come in, while Klaus's you could see the entire city. Caroline set her tea cup down and sat next to Klaus on the couch.

"what are you watching?" Caroline asked

"Not sure, everything's about this storm. They shut down the trains and buses it seems"

"Good thing you found us"

* * *

"Elena, I don't understand why you care so much about what Care and Damon are doing" Matt said

"It's not like them! It's not like her!"

"why do you care? You broke up with him! Let it go!"

"I'm her friend!"

"Well she was my girlfriend and I let her go for you! And it looks like you can't do the same for Damon!"

"Matt!"

"No Elena, I made my choice and I thought you did too, looks like I was wrong"

"Matt! I can't just stop caring! I was with him for a while"

"And I was with Care for a while too, and it didn't hurt any less when I broke up with her. You think this is easy for me? You think you're the only one in this relationship that's hurting? Every time you bring him up it's like you're telling me you regret picking me"

"It's not like that"

"It is like that. If you want to talk about him all the time, then why don't you just got to him then?"

"Matt! I love you!"

"You sure as hell don't act like it!"

* * *

Caroline fell asleep on Klaus's shoulder. Her body curled into his and he placed his arm around her. He was watching a horror movie, where people were getting their hearts ripped out of their chests. He looked over at her and moved her so she was laying down. She started to wake up and looked up at him.

"Klaus?"

Klaus realized he was far too close to her. He wanted to pull away but couldn't. Her hand was already on his shoulders and she looked up at him. He leaned down to kiss her. But they both heard this strange weezing sound and looked around. They saw duck sleeping on his carpet. It sounded like duck was snoring. They both started to laugh, Caroline covered her mouth, giggling at the fact that duck was snoring. Klaus buried his face in her neck laughing.

"I didn't know ducks could do that" Klaus said

"Me neither" Caroline laughed

They both laughed as duck continued to snore. It seems like duck wasn't waking up for anything.

"I miss you" Caroline said

Three words, that carried so much weight. He could feel that the atmosphere in the room had changed when she said it.

"Damon came to see me" Klaus said

"I know, he brought back your Greta"

"She's not my Greta, she's my executive assistant, which Damon was so adamant on screwing"

"He's like that. Don't let him near your sister"

"I'd kill him first"

"Many have tried"

"I'd be the first"

"Get in line"

Klaus smiled as his fingers gently brushed against her cheek.

"You know there's nothing going on with me and him. It would be kinda gross" Caroline said

"So he says, he called you, I believe the awkward cousin he's forced to talk to"

"Awkward? Like he's so hot himself"

"He did say he was a bit of a manwhore"

"Well he is. He has a different woman in there every week it seems. The only thing that is constant is duck and chicken"

"Duck who is apparently snoring away. I don't think that's normal"

"Duck has a lot of issues"

"I'm beginning to pick up on that"

"But he's not afraid of you"

"Because I have a roasting pan with his name on it!"

Klaus tickled Caroline and she started laughing as she tried to squirm away from him. Duck shook his head and woke up and saw the two of them laughing on the couch. Duck got up and went to get more water.

Klaus finally stopped when his hands touched the bare skin under the shirt she was wearing. Slowly he started to push the shirt up. He leaned down to kiss her and stopped.

"You should know I'm rather possessive" Klaus said

"I kinda picked up on that. You should know that I am too"

"Really?"

"I don't like the fact that Greta is eye fucking you every chance she gets"

"I don't like how you parade yourself around in such skimpy, tiny shorts"

"You seem to like them"

"Only when they're on my floor"

"Just trust me ok?"

"Alright love, I'll try"

* * *

Damon is hanging up a painting on the wall. It's an oil painting of a chicken dressed in king's clothing holding a scepter. Chicken walks over and clucks in approval.

"Yeah I thought you'd like it"

There was a knock at the door. Damon looked down at chicken.

"Well it's not duck, and Blondie's not here. Stefan has a key, so I wonder who it is" Damon said

Damon opened the door and saw drenched Elena standing there.

"Damon I need to talk to you"

* * *

And there it is! Are you amused? I should just do a chapt where it's duck and chicken's point of view while they watch these stupid humans run about the apartment. XD Happy Holidays!


	9. Chapter 9

AN: Thanks for reading, no beta still. Happy Holidays hope you are all amused and some place warm and happy. Here's my holiday present to you!

* * *

Damon slams the door closed before Elena can say anything else. He locks it and walks away from the door.

"Chicken protect me from the crazies" Damon said

"Damon! I just want to talk!" Elena said through the door

"Chicken says no"

"Damon, I'm completely soaked, and I don't have anywhere else to go"

Damon looks at chicken who shakes his head no.

"Chicken says no! You can't come in"

"Damon please! I just want to talk!"

"Don't tell duck" Damon said as he opened the door

Elena walked in and chicken walked up to her, looking at her. Damon closed the door and saw chicken and Elena staring each other down.

"You be nice to chicken or else you have to leave" Damon said

"It's a chicken!"

"Yes he knows he's a chicken, kinda like you're Elena. You don't hear me yelling it at you do you?"

"Where's Caroline?"

"With Klaus"

"Who's Klaus?"

"A dick, who she's probably riding right about now"

"Damon!"

"What? She is. Those two go at it like rabbits"

Chicken clucked in agreement.

"So you're not together?" Elena asked

"Why does everyone think that? I just told you blondie was screwing some other guy. She's my roommate that makes awesome crescent rolls"

"So she's with this Klaus guy and you're still single?"

"Single is a relative term here. Free agent is more like it. I'm like a 24 hour diner, everyone that comes in gets something warm and a smile when they leave"

"Damon you don't have to hide the fact that you're hurting"

"You're out of the loop, so here it is. I'm not hurting, I'm having fun, and I'm over you"

"You don't have to pretend"

"Not everything is about you! It's about me!"

"So you and Caroline just buy lingerie together?"

"No, that was for Klaus"

"And does Klaus know?"

"Why are you going to run and tell him? Ruin Blondie's chance at happiness cause you have the need to be oh so moral right now? Where was your morality when you were cheating me with Matt? Where was it when you decided to leave me for him? Or when he kicked blondie out for you? Where was it then?"

"You know it was complicated"

"No it wasn't, you cheated, you thought you were getting a better deal, and now you've realized you didn't. Quarterback not doing it for you?"

"I just wanted to talk"

"No, you just wanted to be your usual self righteous judgemental self"

"I did what I thought was right for me"

"Well good for you, I'm doing what's right for me. And you need to leave"

"Well I can't, all the roads are closed and the trains and buses aren't running"

"You did this on purpose. For a second there I'd say you took after your sister Kat"

"I'm nothing like her"

"Course not, she's way more fun. She could be a manipulative bitch, but at least she owned up to it"

"I didn't come here to fight"

"Whatever. I'm going to take a bath, chicken let's go" Damon said

Damon walked towards the bathroom and chicken followed him. Elena stood there, shivering, wondering what happened.

* * *

Caroline felt a warm body pressed up against hers as she slept. She slowly opened her eyes and felt his arm around her waist as she lifted her head up. She turned back to look at Klaus who slept peacefully. She was about to rest her head back on the pillow when she saw duck standing there. She sat up and looked at duck. She realized she was naked and looked around for the shirt she was wearing. She quietly got out of bed and pulled the shirt on. Duck followed her as she walked out into the kitchen. She saw the tea cup was empty and filled it with more water. She opened the refrigerator looking for food.

"You must be hungry, sorry I don't know what he has in here" Caroline said as she looked through the fridge

Duck stood there and watched her. She realized there was a ton of bacon and sausage but barely any vegetables. She found a few tomatoes and started to wash them. She cut them up for duck and placed them on a plate.

"I think you can eat tomatoes" Caroline said as she set the plate down on the floor

Duck happily started eating. Caroline watched duck. She wanted to go back to Klaus's giant bed, with his 1000 count egyptian cotton sheets, and giant down blanket that was so warm. She felt a pair of arms wrap around her waist and she jumped slightly. She felt warm lips on her neck.

"Morning love" Klaus said

"Morning" Caroline answered

"I see you're feeding the duck"

"Yeah, there wasn't much in the fridge, I don't think he can eat bacon"

"He can eat whatever he wants"

"Then he'll get fat, and we'll have to put him on a diet and take him on walks. And all the other ducks will make fun of him"

"They'll do no such thing. Now that duck's had his breakfast," Klaus says as he turns her around, "Maybe I'll get something to eat as well"

"Making more bacon?" Caroline asked

Klaus lifted Caroline onto his counter, she yelped when the cold marble touched her skin. Klaus disappeared from her sight and she looked down and found him between her legs.

"Duck is right there" Caroline said

"He's eating and so am I"

"Klaus!"

Caroline gripped onto the counter as she felt Klaus's warm tongue. Her fingers threaded through the curls on his head and she began panting. She let out a small whimper as Klaus pulled her thighs further apart.

"Klaus!"

* * *

Stefan opened the door to Damon's apartment with his key. He walked in and saw Elena wearing one of Damon's shirts sleeping on the couch with a blanket. Stefan walked past her and into Damon's room. Damon was still sleeping with chicken next to him. Stefan decided to jump onto the bed, scaring chicken and waking up Damon. Chicken jumped off the bed, screaching and flapping its wings.

"What the hell?" Damon said as he rubbed his eyes

"Morning sunshine!" Stefan said

"You scared chicken!"

"He'll recover, so are you going to tell me why Elena is on your couch?"

"Ugh, she wouldn't leave"

"And wearing your shirt?"

"She got caught in the rain. And I don't think Caroline would want her to wear her stuff."

"So why is she still here?"

"Why are you here?"

"To check on you, see if you're alive and all"

"I'm alive, now leave"

"I can't leave you unattended with Elena here. You are prone to doing stupid things"

"Not with her. She doesn't like chicken"

"Is that all? Not that she broke your heart and all"

"Maybe that too"

"So the storm's over, everything's running again. You should really get rid of her before you do something stupid. Cmon get up let's go get breakfast. I know this place has awesome pancakes"

"Pancakes?"

"Red velvet pancakes"

"I'm up!" Damon said jumping out of bed

* * *

Damon and Stefan were walking out of his room to go get breakfast. They both stopped suddenly when they saw Elena sleeping on his couch. Damon quietly started to walk towards the door with Stefan following. They left the apartment and locked the door. Elena was still sleeping.

* * *

Duck was walking around Klaus's apartment. Klaus was talking to someone on his phone in a room, with the door slightly open. He could hear Caroline still in the shower. Duck heard Klaus's voice and nudged the door open and walked inside.

"Yes I'm aware the markets are open Elijah" Klaus said

Duck looked around the room and walked in more looking at everything. Caroline saw duck walk into a room and followed him. She only had a towel wrapped around herself when she saw duck standing there looking at Klaus who was facing the window.

"Yes, I'll be working from home. Just check on Rebekah" Klaus said

Caroline looked around the room and noticed all the different canvases that were piled against each other. She saw the sketches taped on the walls and in piles on the tables. She saw paints scattered about. She realized she was in his art studio.

"Yes I'll look at the report. I'll talk to you later" Klaus said as he hung up

Duck looked at up his back, wondering what he was doing. Klaus turned back around and saw the duck standing there and Caroline in a towel looking around.

"What are you two doing in here?" Klaus asked

"I followed Duck" Caroline said

"Duck is getting far too comfortable here" Klaus said walking past duck

"Did you do all these?" Caroline asked

"Yes"

"I never knew you were an artist" Caroline said

"It's a hobby of mine"

"Can you show me?"

"After lunch"

Caroline reached out and grabbed his arm pulling him back. She let go of the towel around her body and placed her other hand around his neck pulling him to her lips. Duck saw they were stumbling back onto on table, knocking over the sketches and tubes of paint. Duck walked out of the room and back into the kitchen.

* * *

Damon and Stefan were throwing a football back and forth in the park.

"So how long are you going to avoid this?" Stefan asked

"Avoid what?" Damon said

"The fact that Elena is still on your couch. You know she won't leave"

"I know"

"you can't keep hiding out here forever, not that I don't love this brother bonding moment"

"I'm offended, I just wanted to spend some time with my baby brother"

"and eat pancakes"

"Those were some amazing pancakes"

"You should try their french toast"

"You're just trying to get me fat"

"You're doing that fine just by yourself"

Damon felt something brush against his leg and looked down. He saw the dark mop standing next to him.

"Mop dog!" Damon smiled

The football hit Damon in the head and he fell back. The dog started to lick his face. Damon started laughing as the rods of hair brushed against him. Stefan ran over.

"Are you ok?" Stefan asked pulling Damon up

"Yeah, fine, mop dog, where have you been?" Damon asked

"You know this dog?" Stefan asked

"Yeah, his smoking hot owner should be somewhere around here"

Damon looked around and saw Rose teaching a yoga class in the park. Stefan looked at the women in the class.

"Which one?" Stefan asked

"The one teaching it"

"Overachiever"

"Don't be jealous"

* * *

Caroline opened the door to her apartment. Klaus was holding duck, who didn't seem to mind him holding him. Duck stayed calm and kept looking up at him. Caroline walked in and saw Elena sleeping on her couch.

"What the hell?" Caroline said

Klaus closed the door and set duck on the floor. Chicken walked out and Duck walked to him. The two birds started clucking and quacking at each other.

_Duck & Chicken's POV_

"Where the hell have you been?" chicken said

"Some place better, what I miss?" duck asked

"The black one tried to get rid of the brown one on the couch, but she kept yelling and wouldn't shut up. Couldn't watch tv, and ended up taking a bath"

"Why is the black one always using my bubble bath?"

"He was hiding from her. I don't like the brown one"

"I don't like her either"

"Where where you?"

"I was with the sunny one. She took me outside and it was raining and she kept shaking it was making me sick. I had to get out of there. So I started to walk on my own and ran into her toy"

"He's always here with her"

"They look so weird without feathers! They're like naked all the time! And they make weird noises when they're together"

"I know! I was there the first night remember?!"

"I was somewhere bigger, bigger windows for the sun. It was pretty big for one person. And they kept making weird noises the whole time!"

"Well at least the sunny one has one toy, the black one has many"

"I hope the sunny one gets rid of the brown one, she's annoying. We had to stop playing that game because she was here"

"Do you think if we poop on her she'll leave?"

"Good idea"

Chicken lifted its wing up and gave duck a high five.

"These humans are weird" Duck said

"You're telling me, are they still talking? They're getting loud" Chicken said

"Why isn't the black one here?"

"He left with the one with funny feathers on his head, abandoned me this morning"

"At least he left you food, the sunny one was busy making weird noises with her toy that she forgot to feed me until the morning!"

"Her toy must be really good"

"I guess, he gets really weird when we stare at him"

Duck and chicken started to laugh. They heard the yelling from Elena and Caroline get louder and louder.

"I'm talking here!" Duck quacked

"You humans are so loud!" Chicken clucked

Klaus stood there as Elena and Caroline argued with each other and then duck and chicken started yelling at Elena and Caroline. He saw the two birds walk towards them. Damon opened the door with Stefan behind him. He paused and saw the two girls yelling and the birds making noises. He took a step back and closed the door and tried to leave. Stefan was blocking him.

"Where are you going?" Stefan asked

"Away" Damon answered

"You can't hide from this"

"I'm not hiding, I'm choosing not to be involved"

"Damon, grow up"

Stefan opened the door and walked in. Damon stood behind him. Caroline turned around and saw them standing there.

"Where the hell have you been?" Caroline yeled

"Getting breakfast. Red velvet pancakes" Damon said

"Hi" Stefan said

Damon placed the take away box in Caroline's hands and walked into the kitchen. Caroline shoved it at Klaus. Stefan took a step back and watched as Caroline walked over to Damon.

"Why is she here?" Caroline asked, "Tell me you didn't"

"I didn't"

"Then why is she here?"

"She wouldn't leave"

"Then make her"

"I tried"

"She's making duck and chicken upset"

"Elena you have to go" Damon said

"Fine" Elena said picking up her clothes

"And where the hell have you been? You obviously didn't go to the vet" Damon said

"Duck ran off and I chased him" Caroline answered

"And what? He ran to Klaus?"

"Yeah he kinda did"

"What have you done to my duck?"

* * *

Elena walked out dress but still wearing Damon's shirt. She held her own shirt in her hands.

"your duck or chicken pooped on my shirt!" Elena said

Caroline and Damon looked over at Duck and chicken whom they swore they looked like they were laughing.

"It happens" Damon said

"You ruined my shirt!" Elena whined

"Same way you ruined my relationship with Matt!" Caroline said

"You knew that was coming" Damon added

"Except now you regret it, why else would you be here? Though if you hadn't been such a selfish person, I wouldn't have moved in here and I wouldn't have met Klaus"

"Who's a dick by the way"

"You keep reminding all of us" Caroline said

"A dick that you like to keep riding" Damon added

"Sometimes I let him ride me" Caroline said

"Caroline!" Klaus yelled

Stefan was leaning on the wall trying not to laugh.

"Keep my shirt then. I don't care. Just get out of our lives already" Damon said

"And stop stalking us!" Caroline said

Elena huffed and ran out of the apartment, slamming the door behind her. Stefan finally let out the laugh he was trying to hold in.

"It's like a damn soap opera, but it's your life" Stefan said

"Don't you have work to do Stefan?!" Damon asked

"Oh no, took the day off to see you. In fact I'm going to get you a cake, you deserve it. And your duck and chicken deserve a treat too" Stefan said

Caroline and Damon both looked over at duck and chicken.

"I think they did it on purpose" Caroline said

"I think they knew what they were doing. They're evil"

"They learned it from you"

"i've got my eye on you two!" Damon pointed to duck and chicken

* * *

Hope you were all amused. Hope you liked Duck & Chicken's point of view. It was fun writing it, and no they don't name things either. I don't know if these animals are colorblind or not but hey, it's more funny that way. Happy Holidays, hope this chapter made you laugh and leave me a review!


	10. Chapter 10

AN: Happy New Year! Just a bit more before the new year. I'm in NYC so it's still 2013 here. hope you're amused. no beta still. thank you for reading!

* * *

Caroline slipped on her shoes and walked out of her room as she heard someone knocking on the door to the apartment. She smiled and opened the door and Klaus stood there in a suit smiling.

"Come in, I just have to get my coat on" Caroline said

Klaus walked in and closed the door. Duck saw him and walked up to him quacking. Klaus looked at the small little hat duck was wearing.

"What are you wearing on your head?" Klaus asked

"it's a hat, duck likes to celebrate too" Damon said

Caroline walked out with her coat on and holding her clutch.

"I'm ready" Caroline said

"Let's go" Klaus said

"See you guys later, and no confetti!" Caroline said as she left

Damon looked down at duck and chicken. Duck was wearing a little black top hat, and chicken had a small disco ball necklace on. Damon put on a top hat made as well and turned the tv on.

"And now we're gonna watch the ball drop, and yes it will be past your bedtime"

* * *

Caroline held onto Klaus's arm as they were in a very large party with people she didn't know. They were mostly people from his job. She wasn't totally sure what Klaus did, except that he worked at a company with Stefan. And that he was the CEO of something. He tried to explain to her but she didn't understand why he had such a huge title if he just basically ran the company. They started to hear the countdown and people started to cheer. The noisemakers were going off and Klaus handed her a glass of champagne.

"You've made this a very interesting year for me love" Klaus said

"Likewise, this year turned out better than I thought" Caroline said

"I'm glad I listened to Stefan that day"

"Me too, otherwise I would have gone home to Virginia"

Klaus gazed at Caroline as she spoke. He was about to say something when the crowd started to count down.

"8, 7,6,5,4,3,2,1! Happy New Year!" everyone screamed

The confetti rained down on them, glasses clinked and people cheered. Klaus smiled at Caroline and leaned in. He kissed her on her cheek, which took her by surprise. He stayed there for a second and closed his eyes, trying to remember this moment. He pulled away slightly.

"Happy New Year Caroline" Klaus said

The way he was looking at her, made her weak. There was an intensity behind it. She didn't understand where it was coming from. She wanted him to kiss her on new years and not on the cheek. What was going on with him tonight? She pulled him by his tie and kissed him. She felt his arm wrap around her waist pulling her closer.

* * *

Damon kicked around a bunch of balloons as the ball dropped. Duck and chicken flapped their wings and pushed the balloons around.

"Happy new year guys. Our first year together and I didn't kill you. It's a miracle! So you're both like 1 now, what is that in bird years?"

Duck and chicken looked at him and then back at each other. It looked like they were talking to each other.

"I've got a surprise for you!"

Damon came back and placed a toy xylophone in front of chicken.

"Now that you've mastered tic tac toe and can shake down people for money, it's time we explored the musical side of you"

Chicken bent down and looked at the instrument. He used his beak and pecked at one of the keys making a sound. Duck watched chicken as he played around with the keys. Damon put an inflatable duck in the pool. It was big enough that duck could sit on it while it floated around. Duck pushed the inflatable duck around trying to show it who was the dominant bird in the pool.

There was a knock at the door and Damon froze. He knew Caroline was out with Klaus and Stefan never knocked. He shushed the birds and quietly walked over to the door. He looked at the peephole to see who it was. His eyes went wide and he made sure the door was locked.

"Hide me" Damon whispered

The two birds looked at him and wondered what was going on.

"Damon! I know you're in there! Let me in!" a woman's voice yelled

Damon walked over to duck and chicken and picked them both up.

"Damon it's me! Let me in! I left him for you! Now we can be together!"

Damon rushed into his room and locked the door. He placed duck and chicken on his bed.

"Don't judge me!" Damon said

"Damon! Let me in! Please!" the woman yelled

"Maybe she'll go away?" Damon asked the two birds

Duck and chicken didn't say anything. They were making themselves comfortable on his bed.

"Ok, I didn't know she was married at the time. And I didn't know she was Ric's estranged crazy wife when I met her in that bar. I didn't know she was going to stalk me. I mean why does this always happen to me?"

Damon heard the sound of duck snoring and looked at him.

"Are you even listening?" Damon said

Chicken nudged duck to make him stop snoring. Chicken then started to go to sleep.

"You can't go to sleep on me! I need help! Ok fine, maybe ignoring her wasn't the greatest thing. But she's married to Ric of all people. And I know they were having issues, but I didn't know who she was when I met her in the bar! You guys are no help!"

Damon reached for his phone and dialed the only person who could help.

* * *

Caroline woke up in an empty bed. She sat up and looked around. Their clothes were thrown all over the room. She wondered where he was. She got out of bed and picked up his shirt and put it on. She walked out of the bedroom towards the kitchen. She saw the light from the tv was on in the living room and walked over. She saw him wearing his pajama pants and a t shirt. He was on the phone and looking at his laptop, while sitting on the couch.

"Yes I know Elijah. Did you check in on her? You sent Kol? Really? What? When did that happen? I'll check on her later today"

Caroline took in his appearance. His hair was messy and he sat there in his pajamas, completely relaxed. On the tv was cartoons, which she found amusing. She saw a cup of tea on the table next to his laptop. He sighed and placed his phone down and took a sip of tea. Caroline walked over to him. He looked up and saw her wearing only his shirt. She took the teacup out of his hands and took a sip before placing it down on the table. Klaus looked up at her wondering what she wanted. Her hands gently cupped his face as she leaned into him. She pressed her forehead to his, and gently pushed him back onto the couch. Her body pressed against his, her legs straddled him and his hands went to her waist. He moved to kiss her but she pulled back slightly. Never breaking eye contact, her hands dropped to his chest, slowly making their way down to his pants. She pulled and tugged at them. His hands slipped under his shirt to feel her warm soft skin. She reached into his pants and pulled out his member. She kissed his forehead as she slowly lowered herself onto him. She heard him groan and his fingers dig into her skin. She loved the power she had over him. With him she was free to be herself. She was free from her inhibitions. She was in control for once in her life, and she liked it. She felt herself getting hot. Her hands were on his chest and she could feel the heat from his body as well. He wanted to touch her, but the shirt was in the way. He reached the hem to pull it up, but she stopped him. He didn't understand why. She reached for the hem of his shirt and pulled it up and tossed it aside. She continued to ride him, the sound of bare skin slapping against bare skin. She pulled back when he tried to kiss her again and wouldn't let him take his shirt off her body. She pushed him back onto the couch.

"Say it" Caroline said

"Say what love?"

"That is so hot"

"Caroline?"

Caroline pulled the shirt she was wearing off. Klaus immediately sat up and placed kisses down her chest. Her fingers wound into the curls on his head. His tongue swirled on her skin as he held her closer. The light from the tv was reflecting off the wall she was facing. She was having morning sex with Klaus while Paddington Bear was walking around in his raincoat on the tv. She pulled his hair slightly, and he looked up at her. She captured his lips with hers and pushed him back onto the couch. It seemed this morning Caroline wanted to be in control, and Klaus was all too willing to let her.

* * *

Damon opened the door to his apartment. A woman's body was pressed against the door and fell back. She had spent the night sleeping at his doorstep.

"No no no no!" Damon pulled her out of his apartment and put her against the wall. He locked his door and left quickly.

* * *

Kol was banging on the door to Rebekah's apartment. Rebekah opened the door and in a bathrobe.

"What is it?!" Rebekah yelled

"Morning sister" Kol said walking in

"What are you doing?"

"Checking in on you"

"Elijah's busy?"

"Yes, he's dealing with Nik's case remember? Your psycho boyfriend pressed charges against him, and you dropped the charges against him?"

"Tell Elijah he doesn't have to worry about that anymore"

"Oh really?"

"I spoke to Alexander last night, he dropped the charges against Nik"

"Why would he do that?"

"Because he loves me"

"Please tell me he's here, so I can beat him to a bloody pulp!"

"He's not here"

"Then who's in your shower?"

"why are you so nosy?"

"Why are you so easily manipulated?"

"I am not!"

A man walked out, his hair still wet from the shower but dressed.

"Who the hell is this?" Kol asked

"He's a friend" Rebekah said

"They're all just friends with you" Kol said

"I'm Vaughn, Galen Vaughn"

"That's nice, now get the hell out! My sister is done with you!" Kol said

"Kol!" Rebekah yelled

"I will not have you being a trollop again!" Kol yelled

"Funny coming from you!" Rebekah yelled

"I'm really just her friend. She threw up on my last night" Vaughn said

"Classy" Kol said

"Could you be more annoying?" Rebekah said

"I'm going to go now" Vaughn said

* * *

Ric walked towards Damon's apartment and saw his soon to be ex wife still sleeping against the wall. He sighed and walked over to her and picked her up into his arms.

"What am I going to do with you Isobel?" Ric said

Isobel whimpered in her sleep and curled into Ric's body as he carried out.

* * *

Klaus's hand gripped the marble counter in his kitchen. His other hand reached down and threaded his fingers into the blonde curls. Caroline seemed determined to make him undone as her tongue slide along his him.

"Caroline, stop, I'm…" Klaus stuttered

Caroline had never heard Klaus stutter, he was always in control and collected. She took him deeper into her mouth. Klaus's entire body stiffened. He let out a sound that wasn't human. The door to his apartment opened and Kol walked in.

"Caroline!" Klaus yelled out

"What are you doing Nik?" Kol asked

Caroline swallowed and heard Kol's voice. She pulled away and quickly got up and ran into the bedroom. Klaus pulled his pants back up and glared at Kol.

"What are you doing here?!" Klaus yelled

"My, my looks like you had a good start to the new year" Kol said

"Kol get out! Give me back my key!"

"Relax Nik, shouldn't you be relaxed after your little blonde friend?"

"Kol!"

"I bring you good news, our sister has managed to fix things"

"What?"

Kol walked over to the fridge and took a carton of orange juice and started to drink from it.

"Don't do that, use a glass!" Klaus yelled

"Why? you don't!"

"Kol, stop annoying me!"

"you know you should return the favor to your blonde friend, it's only fair"

"I would have, if someone didn't show up uninvited"

"Bexx ended things with Alexander, and managed to get the charges against you dropped. And now she's moved onto someone new, different accent, not sure where he's from, there have been so many"

Caroline was walking out, dressed in last night's dress and heels.

"Going so soon?" Kol asked

"I should be going" Caroline said

"But Nik didn't get breakfast yet, you obviously did" Kol said

"Kol!" Klaus yelled

"You have a little something on your face over here" Kol motioned

Caroline touched her face wondering what Kol was talking about.

"Looks like there's some of Nik still left on you" Kol said

Caroline felt her cheeks flush pink. She looked down and went to grab her clutch.

"KOL!" Klaus yelled, "Get out!"

"What's the point? You already finished." Kol smirked

Klaus went after Caroline, he grabbed her arm to stop her.

"Don't go love, my brother is a pain, but he'll be leaving now" Klaus said

"I should go. I'll call you later"

Caroline grabbed her coat and kissed Klaus on the cheek as she quickly left. Klaus watched her leave and then turned back to face Kol.

"I hope you're happy" Klaus said

"Me? If anything you should be happy. Did she not do it for you?"

"Say another word and I'll rip your liver out!"

"Touchy, you must really like her"

* * *

Hope you were amused. I see a lot of you liked Duck and Chicken's POV. I'll write another one for them soon. Happy New Year, and leave me a review! XD


	11. Chapter 11

AN: Happy New Year! Hope it was a good one! No beta still. Hope you are amused!

* * *

Caroline was towards Klaus's office. Klaus had been acting strange lately. She couldn't put her finger on it, but there was a change in him, she didn't know what exactly it was. She had never visited him at work, but decided to. She saw Greta sitting at her desk outside his office.

"I'm here to see Klaus" Caroline said

"Do you have an appointment?" Great asked

"No, I'm here to see him"

"He's very busy"

"Tell him I'm here"

"He's rather busy"

"Really?" Caroline said as she opened the door to his office

Caroline walked inside and saw how massive it was. Klaus was sitting behind his desk, looking at reports on his laptop. He looked up and saw Caroline standing there with Greta behind her.

"What are you doing here love?" Klaus asked as he got up

"I came to see you" Caroline said

"Leave us" Klaus said to Greta

Greta only nodded and closed the door. Caroline walked over to him, looking around his office.

"I've never seen where you work" Caroline said

"I've never seen where you work either love"

"You're office is huge, and you're the only person in here?"

"Yes"

"I was going to ask you if you wanted to have lunch"

* * *

Stefan walked into his office and saw a bottle on his desk with a red bow on it. He walked over to it and saw it was his favorite bottle of bourbon. He picked it up on and there was a small tag on it.

_To Stefan, Happy New Year, Klaus_

Stefan wondered why Klaus gave him the bottle. It wasn't his birthday. He took the bottle with him as he headed towards Klaus's office.

* * *

Klaus had torn open Caroline's blouse, pulling the shirt down her shoulders, inadvertently trapping her arms. He pushed her down onto his desk, while she struggled with his pants. Klaus pulled the shirt off her arm, allowing her arms free. He pushed her skirt up to her waist and placed one of her legs onto his shoulder. His hand wrapped around the boot on her leg and he pushed inside her. Caroline gasped. He placed her other leg on his shoulder and observed her boots.

"I like these boots" Klaus said

"Is that all you like?" Caroline asked

* * *

Stefan was walking towards Klaus's office when he saw Greta smirking. She looked up and saw Stefan.

"He's busy" Greta said

"He's always busy" Stefan said as he opened the door

Stefan almost dropped the bottle when he saw the two of them half naked on Klaus's desk. The image of Caroline's legs on his shoulders were burned into his mind.

"What the hell?!" Stefan yelled as he turned around and slammed the door behind him

Klaus and Caroline looked up and saw Stefan running out. Caroline covered her face.

"Why does this keep happening!?" Caroline said

"You're just lucky" Klaus said

"Oh my god, stop, we have to get dressed" Caroline said

"Why?"

"Because Stefan is right outside the door!"

"So is Greta, that didn't bother you"

"She didn't see what we were doing! Oh my god! Stefan saw my boobs!"

* * *

Damon was sitting on the couch watching duck and chicken. He started knitting and was making a scarf and hat for duck and chicken. Duck looked at Damon and quacked.

"What? You don't like blue? I think it brings out your eyes" Damon said

Duck shook his head and walked off. There was a knock on the door. Damon got up and looked through the peephole and sighed. He opened the door and quickly ducked. Ric looked at him strangely.

"Last time you hit me" Damon said

"I'm not here to fight with you" Ric said

"Then why are you here?"

"Why did you call me on New Years Even?"

"Because she's your wife"

"Yeah well you slept with her"

"I didn't know when I met her that she was your wife! You're not gonna hit me again are you?"

'No, I'm not ok. Look she ended things with me, she doesn't want to be with me anymore, so you can deal with her"

"No! NO NO NO! You should work things out, you know the sanctity of marriage and all that"

"She doesn't want me"

"She does, she's just a little crazy. look she really loves you, and you're the only one who can put up with her. If that's not love then I don't know what is"

"Don't call me again Damon, if she shows up, I'm not responsible for her anymore"

"You don't want to be so hasty in this, think about it over a drink"

Duck and chicken walked towards the door and started making noises. Ric looked at the two birds and then back at Damon.

"What is that?" Ric asked

"It's a duck and a chicken" Damon answered

"I know that, what are you doing with it?"

"Hey! They live here!"

"They pay rent?"

"Not yet"

* * *

Stefan sat in chair, holding the glass in his hands. He drank the amber liquid inside and placed it back on the desk. There was a knock at his door.

"Come in" Stefan said

Klaus opened the door and walked in.

"Stefan, see that's called knocking, you should try it" Klaus said

Stefan poured himself another drink and gulped it down.

"Well I wasn't expecting to see my friends going at it on the desk that you're suppose to be working on" Stefan said

"I was working"

"Oh, stop! I can't get that image out of mind. I'm blind again!"

"Stop with the dramatics"

"Seriously I know you run the company but cmon, lock the door"

"Well suffice to say Caroline will not be visiting me here again"

"Locks, you should try them, they keep people out of your office. Some of us don't want to go to therapy"

"Oh come now, it's not like you've never seen me naked"

"Stop right there! Stop! You and naked should never be in the same sentence"

"And they say women are dramatic"

"I did not want to see that at all. How am I suppose to look at Caroline again? Especially after what you were doing to her"

"She's quite flexible, she said she was a cheerleader before"

"Klaus! I don't want to know!"

"Alright, what were you coming into my office for?"

"Well I was going to thank you for the bottle, but I don't know what it's for. It's not my birthday, so…"

"Can't a friend just give another friend a present?"

"What's the catch?"

"No catch"

"Something's going on with you"

"Nothing's going on. Why does everyone think that?"

"You're different"

"I'm still the same see?"

"No, you're happier, still sarcastic but happy"

"Wonderful observation, is this what I pay you for?"

"You're going to be paying for my therapy"

"Enjoy your drink" Klaus waved off as he walked towards the door

"It's her isn't it? She's actually managed to get past that cold, calculating exterior of yours"

"Now you're just imagining things" Klaus said stopping

"And to think, if you didn't come with me that day to see if Damon was alive, you wouldn't have met her"

"Well you did drag me there" Klaus reached for the doorknob

"And if I didn't tell her to move in with Damon she'd be back in Virginia, doing god knows what"

"She mentioned that"

"Then you also know that she had no real reason to stay after what Matt and Elena did to her. I'm glad she stayed, she's good for you, and Damon. She would have died in that town"

Klaus smiled for a bit and quickly turned his expression cold. He turned around to face Stefan.

"She would have thrived wherever she was" Klaus said

"No, that town would have killed her light. She belongs in a big city, hopes and dreams and all that stuff. She deserves something good in her life"

"She does"

"And I don't ever want to see the two of you remotely half naked together ever again!"

"Does my body make you uncomfortable?"

"Not as much as seeing me naked. Or did you forget college?"

"Let's never talk of that again"

* * *

Caroline sat in the bathtub while Duck floated near her. Chicken was standing on the toilet looking at them.

"I have the worst luck, I can't believe Stefan just walked in on us! I was so mortified! I think he saw my boobs!" Caroline said

Duck and chicken didn't say anything as she went on.

Klaus knocked on the door of her apartment. Damon was running down the hallway towards the apartment. Behind him was a brunette who was chasing him. Damon saw Klaus standing by the door.

"Out of the way!" Damon said as he took his keys out

Klaus moved and saw the brunette jump on Damon's back. Damon hit the door and slid down the door. Klaus watched amused at the two of them on the floor.

"Damon? Where are you going? I got you the cheese you like" the girl said

"I don't like cheese, I'm lactose, very sensitive stomach" Damon said getting up

"But you ate so many last time."

"Look, you're a nice girl, but this isn't going to work" Damon said

"Why? You flirted with me at the market"

"I'm just friendly with everyone"

"Do you have a girlfriend or something?"

"No,"

"Then what's the problem?"

"I have a boyfriend! And there he is, and he's the jealous type" Damon said grabbing Klaus

Klaus looked shocked as Damon put his arm around him.

"Boyfriend?" the girl said shocked

"Yes boyfriend, we're in a committed relationship" Damon said

"Get your hands off me!" Klaus yelled

"Oh don't be like that honey, she doesn't mean anything to me" Damon said

"Don't touch me!" Klaus yelled

"He's upset, he doesn't like it when girls hit on me" Damon said

The door opened and there was Caroline in a bathrobe looking at them.

"what the hell are you doing out here?" Caroline asked

"Who are you? His girlfriend?" the girl asked

"No she's mine" Klaus said

The girl looked at all three of them strangely.

"I don't know what weird shit you're into, but it's too kinky for me!" the girl said before running off.

"Good job guys" Damon said walking into the apartment

Caroline stood there dumbfounded.

"I'm your girlfriend?" Caroline asked

"It sounds better than lover" Klaus said

Caroline grabbed him by his shirt and pulled him into the apartment. She pushed him against the door and kissed him.

"Hey! There are children here!" Damon yelled

Caroline and Klaus broke apart and looked at Damon. Duck and chicken both clucked and quacked at them.

"You go do your sinful business in your own room! Not in the bathroom! Or on the couch! Your room!" Damon said

"Fine dad!" Caroline said dragging Klaus behind her

"Use protection!" Damon yelled

* * *

Klaus stepped out of the shower in his apartment. Caroline was going to be over soon. She had an early yoga class and needed to shower at her apartment before heading over. He paused when he saw her pink toothbrush hanging in the holder. It was right next to his. It was the only thing she had left in his apartment. Aside from the pink plastic toothbrush there was no evidence that she was ever there.

Klaus dried himself off, when he heard the doorbell. He grabbed his bathrobe and put it on while heading towards the door. He opened it and there was Caroline, carrying a large bag and smiling.

"Hey" Caroline leaned and kissed him on the cheek

"Let me help you with that love"

Klaus took the large bag from her and placed it on the counter. Caroline closed the door behind her and took her shoes off. She walked over and started taking things out of the bag.

"What's all this?" Klaus asked

"We're making pancakes!"

"Why?"

"Because I like pancakes"

"Do you?"

"Yes, pancakes, so fluffy I could die. But I like other things more"

"Such as?"

"You just out of the shower"

Caroline grabbed him by the collar of his bathrobe and pulled him close. She buried her face in his neck, taking in his scent. She began tugging at the bathrobe, trying to get it off.

"Thought you wanted pancakes love"

"I'm hungry for something else"

* * *

Caroline walked into Klaus's massive closet and looked around for something to wear. It was getting cold in his apartment. She saw this hideous sweater that was buried under a pile of other sweaters. Klaus did not like sweaters it seemed. She pulled out the mustard colored sweater which was too big for her. She put it on anyways and felt how soft it was. She wondered why Klaus would have such a hideous thing.

Klaus was outside finishing up a phone call when his doorbell rang. He went to answer it.

"Elijah? Finn?" Klaus asked

"We're here to discuss your case" Elijah said walking in

Finn walked in and closed the door and noticed a pair of women's shoes.

"I thought the charges against me were dropped" Klaus said

"They were, this is just some formal paperwork" Elijah said

"The faster we do this the faster I can go home" Finn added

"Very well" Klaus said

Klaus heard the sound of footsteps coming towards the kitchen. All three men looked up when they heard her enter. Caroline stood there shocked, dressed in a mustard sweater and nothing else that barely reached her thighs.

"It's that hideous jumper again" Finn said

"Who is this?" Elijah asked

Caroline froze as she was trying to pull the sweater further down. Klaus groaned inwardly. He really didn't want Caroline to meet his family. Rather he didn't want his family to chase her away yet.

"This is Caroline, Caroline my older brothers Finn and Elijah" Klaus said

Caroline waved and then quickly turned to leave. Klaus reached out and grabbed her arm to keep her from leaving.

"You don't have to rush off" Klaus said

"Why do you have that hideous jumper still?" Elijah asked

"You know why, Rebekah would have his head if he threw it out. She bought it just to spite you" Finn said

"She did" Klaus said

"Rebekah, your sister?" Caroline asked

"Yes, have you met her?" Elijah asked

"Briefly" Caroline said

"You're the girl that punched him in the-" Finn said

"Finn!" Klaus yelled

"No need to yell Niklaus" Elijah said

"So is this your friend?" Finn asked

Klaus sighed and rubbed his eyes.

"She's my girlfriend. Go ahead, report back to everyone" Klaus said

"We already knew" Elijah said

"Rebekah and Kol kept us informed" Finn added

"But he just-" Caroline started to say

"Our brother is very stubborn, and dense and rather slow. But it took him long enough. Now let's finish this paperwork so I can go home already" Finn said

"We're your older brothers Niklaus, of course we know everything, that and Kol cannot keep a secret." Elijah said

"I need to get my key back from him" Klaus said

"Like that's ever happening" Finn laughed

* * *

Damon was eating pancakes while sitting across from Stefan. They were in a diner, sitting in a both by themselves.

"You haven't touched your food" Damon said

"I'm not really hungry" Stefan answered

"Are you on those juice cleanses or something?"

"No, I just, I don't want to talk about it"

"What happened?"

"I don't want to talk about it"

"Must be really bad, I'm cheaper than a therapist and I won't judge you"

"Course you will"

"No I won't. cmon spill, who else are you gonna tell if not me?"

"I accidentally walked in on Klaus and Caroline"

"No way! Where?!"

"In his office"

"On his desk? That's so cliche!"

"I did not need not see that at all. I'm blinded by that image forever burned in my mind"

"So you saw blondie naked?! Was Klaus naked? Cause that would just kill it"

"Damon!"

"What? What color are her nipples? I've always wondered"

"No Damon!"

"Did you get a good view? Was he twisting her all over his desk? Did he bend her over the desk or was-"

"NO DAMON! I don't want to think about it ever again!"

"Well did you knock?"

"I"m going to be sick!" Stefan says as he rushes out of his seat

Damon takes his fork and reaches over to steal Stefan's food. A waitress walks over and drops the bill on the table. Damon looks at it and sees the waitress has written her name and number on it. He smiles and looks over.

"Hello Charlotte"

* * *

Hope you were amused. The sweater, the ugly mustard sweater I saw on tumblr. I think someone wrote a drabble about it, how they both had the same sweater or something. anyways, I thought it was kinda funny. That and the fact that everyone's going to walk in on them at this rate. XD poor stefan. No klefan. you can go read those fics elsewhere. I'm going through the list of women Damon messed with, damn he got around. I"m sure Charlotte will make things interesting, since he's already messed with Andi, Rose, and Greta. (though Greta wanted to mess with Klaus) but hey, I'm sure there's more women for Damon! If you haven't figured it out, I don't ship Elena with anyone, Damon and Stefan are their own free agents! Leave me a review! Thanks!


	12. Chapter 12

AN: Another chapter, I'm sick right now and it's artic weather in nyc right now so there isn't much I can do except read and write and update. No beta. Enjoy. thanks for reading.

* * *

Klaus woke up in the middle of the night. He saw Caroline curled up against his chest. Her hand was resting on his chest as she was sleeping. He moved slightly as he tried not to wake her. He pulled away slightly and her arm reached out and threw itself around his waist. She murmured something in her sleep while moving closer to him. He pulled the blanket over her shoulders to keep her warm. His thumb brushed along her cheek. The moonlight illuminated her face and he watched her while she slept.

And then suddenly it hit him. The realization of it all. Why he was being so gentle and tender with her. Why he was feeling different. Why he was feeling happy all the time. He pulled away from her quickly and got out of bed. He looked around for his clothes and pulled on his pajama pants and a t shirt and left the room quickly. He walked into his studio a room he kept locked. He sat inside staring at the blank canvas. Running his fingers through his hair he rubbed his eyes and looked at the canvas again.

He went to the table filled with sketches and noticed that the new ones he had done were all of her. He dropped them and took a few steps back. He was scared. He was scared because he knew he was falling in love with her.

* * *

Damon was asleep in his bed with Charlotte next to him. She woke up when she heard the sound of clucking and saw chicken walking around in the room. She sat up and looked at chicken who ignored her and walked out. She got up and followed the chicken into the kitchen, where she saw duck.

"Hmmm a duck" Charlotte said

Duck looked up and saw the woman standing there. Charlotte dove to grab duck who jumped out of the way and started quacking. Chicken started running and clucking for help. Duck ran into Damon's room. Charlotte was chasing after him. Duck jumped onto the bed and Charlotte did too. She landed ontop of Damon.

"What the hell?" Damon said as he woke up

Duck was flapping its wings and quacking loudly. Damon looked around and saw duck and chicken flapping their wings and Charlotte ready to jump on duck again.

"What are you doing?" Damon asked

"Getting breakfast!" Charlotte said

"what? NO! You leave them alone!" Damon yelled

"But you have a chicken! Who probably has eggs"

"No! You leave duck and chicken alone!"

"But I want breakfast!"

"You need to leave NOW!"

"What?"

"You cannot eat them! Get out!"

"What?!"

"Get out!"

* * *

Caroline opened the door to her apartment to hear Damon and a woman yelling at each other. She walked in and saw Damon half dressed and the woman completely naked.

"Who the hell is this?! Is she your girlfriend?" Charlotte yelled

"No, she's my roommate" Damon said

"She's your girlfriend! Oh my god!" Charlotte yelled

Caroline took a step back from Charlotte.

"You lied to me!" Charlotte yelled

"I did not!" Damon yelled back

Charlotte grabbed Caroline's hair and pulled her down onto the floor. Damon grabbed Charlotte to stop her from hurting Caroline. Duck and chicken started pecking at Charlotte's feet and trying to make her let Caroline go. Caroline grabbed Charlotte's long brown hair and yanked her down, slamming her head onto the floor.

"Hair pulling really?" Caroline said

"Let her go" Damon said while holding Charlotte

"Tell her animals to stop bothering me!" Charlotte yelled

"Let go of her or I'll call the cops" Damon said

"Fine" Charlotte hissed

Caroline got up and picked up duck and chicken. She carried them into the hallway.

"Take out the trash!" Caroline yelled

* * *

Damon was making duck and chick shaped cookies in the kitchen. He heard Caroline walk in through the door, tired from work. Caroline sat down on the couch and kicked off her shoes. Duck walked over to her and looked at her.

"I'm so tired" Caroline said

"Nice to see you too. Where's dinner?" Damon asked

"Why are you asking me?"

"Because Klausy always brings you dinner"

"He's away on business this week"

"What? You didn't clear this with me!"

"Damon!"

"A whole week?"

"The week's almost over, not like you noticed. You were out with a different girl this week"

"Oh I was. Nevermind"

Duck walked over to Caroline and rubbed its head against her leg. Caroline reached down and stroked the feathers on his head.

"Careful Duck, Klaus will get jealous" Damon said

"Doubt it. He hasn't called all week"

"Has it been a week already? Where does the time go"

"Damon, I just told you"

"Oh yeah, so he hasn't called, he is working. Not like he went to Chicago or something"

"Wait, he did go to chicago, what's in Chicago?!"

"Nothing, nothing! Just that him and Stefan used to get into all kinds of trouble there"

"what kind of trouble?"

"The kind that involves lots of alcohol"

"Why did he go to Chicago for?!"

"Just calm down. you said so yourself it's business"

"Oh my god!"

"Calm down blondie! Don't jump to conclusions!"

"What am I suppose to think?!"

"Nothing, just meet him at the airport"

"I don't know his flight"

"I got this" Damon reached into his phone and called someone

* * *

Caroline stood at the airport looking around. She was at the right arrival gate and she looked around for him. The people soon started filing out. Damon managed to get the info from Greta, she was his assistant. She provided the flight number and arrival time. And told him that he was in fact in Chicago for business, she had all his meetings lined up, leaving him no time for anything else.

Klaus was tired from his trip. A week filled with business meetings and lunches, followed by more meetings and then a call from Elijah telling him how Rebekah was. He pulled his luggage behind him as he walked out. He scanned around for his driver but couldn't find him. He rubbed his eyes and kept walking. Caroline took out the sign with his name on it and held it up. She turned around and saw him standing there. She lowered the sign down.

"Hi" Caroline said

"What are you doing here?" Klaus asked

"Not the response I was hoping for, I'm here to surprise you. Surprise"

Klaus smiled and pulled her into his arms, hugging her. He buried his face into her neck and sighed. He was glad to be home.

* * *

Caroline opened the door to her apartment with Klaus behind her. She saw Damon chasing the same brunette woman around who was chasing after chicken. Chicken saw Caroline and ran to her.

_Chicken & Duck POV_

"Save me!" chicken said jumping into Caroline's arms

"Save me too!" Duck said jumping around Klaus

Klaus bent down picked up the duck who seemed to calm down.

Caroline, Damon and Charlotte were yelling and arguing.

"She tried to eat me!" Chicken said

"She tried to eat me too! This one is too crazy! The black one needs to get rid of her!" Duck said

"She's worse than the other brown one!"

"I'm glad the sunny one came back and brought her toy"

"Get rid of her already!" Chicken said

"These humans are so loud"

"This brown one likes to be naked all the time, and it is not pretty"

"She makes weird screeching noises"

"Hey what are you doing?!" Duck said

Klaus put duck on the floor. He moved in front of Caroline who dropped chicken.

"Watch it!" Chicken yelled

The two birds quickly ran off and saw the humans fighting. Charlotte tried to hit Caroline, but Klaus stopped her instead getting hit in the face instead. Caroline punched Charlotte in the face and then dragged her outside and slammed the door. Damon and Klaus stood there amazed.

Duck and chicken were clapping in the background.

"I wonder if her hair tastes like corn" Duck said

"Maybe it tastes like the sun" Chicken said

Duck walked over to Caroline and jumped a bit for her to pick him up. Caroline picked up duck who snuggled itself into her chest. Klaus watched the bird and a tinge of jealousy took over. Duck was burying its face into Caroline's chest and then looked up at her. She was yelling something at Damon. Duck then started to nip at her hair. He started to eat it. He stopped.

"Doesn't taste like corn, but it looks like it" Duck said

"Lemme try!" Chicken said

Damon picked up chicken and placed him on the counter.

"Hey, what are you doing?" Chicken said

Chicken felt something being placed on his body and looked around.

"No! Get this off me! No Human! I said no!" chicken said

"Damon, chicken doesn't like it, stop you're making him upset" Caroline said

"I made this for him" Damon said

"You what?" Caroline said in disbelief

"I made this for them! I knitted it myself!" Damon said

"It's hideous!" Klaus said

"No one asked you!" Damon said

Damon placed a blue knitted cape on Chicken who wanted it off. Damon took out something else that was blue and knitted. A scarf for duck and spats for his feet. All the same shade of pale blue.

"You are not putting that on duck" Caroline said

"Oh cmon they wear it all the time" Damon said taking duck from her

Damon placed the scarf around duck who seemed annoyed and then placed the spats on his feet. Duck started freaking out and trying to get them off.

"Get it off me! Get it off me!" Duck said

"No get this thing off me!" Chicken said

"I can't walk!"

"I can't fly!"

"You couldn't fly in the first place!"

"Neither could you!"

"Enough Damon" Caroline said taking the cape off chicken

"What are you doing?" Damon asked

"Sparing them" Caroline said taking the spats off duck

"But I made a hat for Duck" Damon said

"No Damon!"

"The sunny one has saved us!" Duck said

"I wanna see if her hair tastes like corn!" Chicken said

"You are turning into those weird people that dress up their dogs in ridiculous outfits, except you're knitting them for duck and chicken" Caroline said

"I am not!" Damon yelled

* * *

Hope you were amused. Spats are the things that scrooge mcduck wears on his feet. He looks rather dashing in them. XD Yes Damon is going out of his mind knitting for duck and chicken. Klaus didn't just go to Chicago for business. But that will be revealed soon enough. Leave me a review. Thanks.


	13. Chapter 13

AN: Thanks for reading. No beta still. And yes, it will be revealed what Klausy was doing in Chicago besides business.

* * *

Caroline awoke in bed alone. She looked around and Klaus wasn't anywhere to be seen. She got out of bed and went into his closet to find a shirt. She was searching for that hideous mustard sweater but couldn't find it. She saw a pile of his clothes neatly folded and freshly laundered from his trip from Chicago. She pulled out a henley from the pile and saw there was something on it. She looked and saw something red on the collar. She turned on the light in his walk in closet and saw that it was paint. In fact there was paint on the sleeve edges. She put the shirt on and walked out. She saw the light from his studio and went to open the door. It was locked. Strange. She pressed her ear to the door to see if he was talking to someone.

Klaus sat on a stool facing his canvas. It remained blank. He stared at the blank canvas and sighed. His trip to Chicago wasn't just for business. It was for inspiration. He went back to Stefan and his old stomping grounds. He went back to the old studio he had there. He didn't know why he still kept it. It was littered with canvases, and sketches and paints. He hadn't touched his work in years it seemed and finally there he felt inspired again.

Caroline went into the kitchen wondering what Klaus was doing in there. She went to pour herself a glass of milk to help her sleep. She noticed Klaus's keys were on the counter, along with another set of keys she'd never seen before. She picked up the other set. There were only a few keys on the ring. They were worn and scratched up. She looked at the keychain itself. It was worn and dented. Hanging on it was a G. She looked at it and it said Gloria's Bar and Grill. She could see it was scratched and dented, that it had been dropped several times, the G started cracking.

"Couldn't sleep love?" Klaus asked

Caroline looked up and saw Klaus standing there watching her.

"Who's Gloria?" Caroline asked

"She owns a bar in Chicago. I'm not sure if she still runs it anymore, I think her son does now" Klaus said walking over and taking the keys from her hands

"Old flame?"

"Hardly, it was a bar Stefan and I used to frequent when we lived in Chicago"

"When were you in Chicago?"

"In our younger days"

"I'll bet. You should get a new laundry service. They left paint on your clothes"

Klaus looked at the collar of the shirt she was wearing and saw the paint.

"I'll make note of that love. Come back to bed"

"I'm having problems falling asleep"

"I'm sure I can help you with that"

* * *

Damon was asleep when he heard a rooster crowing. He opened his eye and looked around. He sat up wondering where the sound came from. Caroline was already walking into the kitchen in her pajamas looking for the source of the sound. Damon was walking into the kitchen and saw duck quacking at chicken to shut up. Chicken stood in the window crowing. There was loud banging on the door. Damon rubbed his eyes and went to answer it. He opened the door and it was Andi standing there.

"What the hell is that noise?!" Andi yelled

"YOU! Go away!" Damon said

Caroline reached out and picked up chicken. Chicken started pecking at her hair.

"It's that damn chicken of yours!" Andi said

"It's going through some changes right now. Turns out it's a he"

"Well tell it to shut the hell up!" Andi yelled

"You first!" Damon slammed the door closed

"So chicken is really a he" Caroline said

"Looks like it. Chicken please not so early, I need my beauty sleep"

"Damon!"

"Too early" Damon said as he went back to his room

Caroline followed him, carrying chicken. Damon went back to bed and Caroline sat on his bed letting chicken walk around.

"I'd say you were free to join me, but Klausy seems like the jealous type"

"He is"

"Then good thing chicken is here to supervise us"

"Damon"

"What, it's like 5am"

"You sleep through most of the day anyways"

"Not the point"

"What's in Chicago?"

"A really big bean"

"What did Stefan and Klaus do in Chicago?"

"Drink, a lot"

"At this place called Gloria's?"

"What do you know about Gloria's?"

"I saw a key chain of it with a set of keys Klaus had. They were really old"

"Old stomping grounds. Klaus used to have an apartment above that place. Total dump"

"Did he bring girls there?"

Damon lifted his head up off the pillow.

"That place was a dump. You wouldn't want to bring anyone there. It was mostly his studio, he used to paint and stuff"

"Paint?"

"Yeah a starving artist, and all that crap"

"Then why would he go there?"

"Less talking, more sleeping"

* * *

Klaus sat at a table waiting for lunch. Kol appeared and sat down across from him. Klaus looked away annoyed.

"What are you doing here?" Klaus asked

"Good to see you too brother" Kol said

A waiter appeared and placed another table next to Klaus's. Elijah appeared and sat down next to him. Klaus took another sip of his drink.

"What are you doing here Elijah?" Klaus asked

"He missed you too, you've been such a recluse lately" Kol said

"I'm busy, some of us work" Klaus said

"More like you're busy with your little blonde friend" Kol said

"Girlfriend actually" Elijah added

Klaus closed his eyes.

"I've already seen her, and she is quite lovely" Kol said

"Finn and I met her when she was walking around his apartment in that hideous jumper Rebekah gave him for his birthday" Elijah said

"That hideous thing?" Kol asked

"Yes, Klaus introduced her as his girlfriend" Elijah said

"He must like her then" Kol said

"Stop talking about me like I'm not here" Klaus said

"Then stop hiding her from us" Elijah said

"Yes, we've all seen her, why are you hiding her away for like some dirty little secret" Kol teased

"I don't want you scaring her away" Klaus said

"We would never, are you ashamed of us? Your own family?" Kol asked

"Yes! You're all insane" Klaus said

"Except for Finn, who's just boring" Kol said

"As I understand it, you've seen her for a few months" Elijah said

"When are we going to be properly introduced to her?" Kol asked

"Enough! I will not put her on display for you to ogle" Klaus said

"Why are you so protective of her?" Kol asked

"She must mean a great deal to you" Elijah said

"so much that you don't want us scaring her away. You must really like her" Kol said

"Or dare I say it? You're in love with her. Why else would you let her wander around your apartment, wearing your clothes" Elijah said

"Nik in love?" Kol said

Klaus immediately got up and left the table. He went to the restroom and splashed some water on his face. His brothers were annoying him to no end. His phone rang and he answered it.

"What?!" Klaus yelled

"Klaus, it's Greta. The Newman files came in finally" Greta said

"I'll be there"

* * *

"It appears Niklaus has abandoned us" Elijah said

"Well we do know where he works" Kol said

"Is there a point to you annoying him?"

"It's fun"

"You should fine a new hobby"

"Don't be so boring. Besides we should pay Stefan a visit"

"Why?"

* * *

Stefan was looking through some files when he heard someone come in. He looked up and saw Kol and Elijah standing in front of his desk.

"Klaus is in his office" Stefan said

"We know" Elijah said

"We came to talk to you" Kol said sitting down

"About what?" Stefan asked

"Caroline, Niklaus seems to be fond of her" Elijah said

"No, I'm not involved. I'm not part of this" Stefan said

"Relax Stefan, we won't tell Nik" Kol said

"You were the one that introduced them" Elijah asked

"Yes, I sorta introduced them. Klaus came with my to Damon's apartment, I was checking up on him to see if he was still alive" Stefan said

"And where does Caroline come in?" Elijah asked

"She lives with Damon. She needed a place to stay, Damon needed a roommate" Stefan said

"I doubt your brother needed a roommate" Elijah said

"Well Elena dumped him, so he was kinda messed up. I just needed someone to be there to make sure he was alive. She ended up cleaning up the place and put some form of order in his life" Stefan said

"Curious, Niklaus has no problems with Caroline living with your brother?" Elijah asked

"No we fixed that. There's nothing going on between them" Stefan said

"And how did you fix that?" Kol asked

"not involved in this. Not involved. Go ask your brother for information about her. Not me" Stefan said

"How long have you know her?" Elijah asked

"I met her a few years ago, though Elena. actually. We got along pretty well" Stefan said

"Yes I do remember your fondness for blondes" Elijah said

"Do tell" Kol said

"How is Alexandra?" Elijah asked

"Lexi is fine" Stefan said

"And how come you and Caroline aren't together?" Kol asked

"Caroline's my friend! You can be friends with the opposite sex" Stefan said

"But why?" Kol asked

* * *

Damon was putting curtains on the windows in the apartment. He hoped keeping the sun out would prevent chicken from crowing so early in the morning. Caroline walked in and kicked her shoes off and sat on the couch. Duck walked over and rubbed its head on her leg. She petted duck. She reached down and picked him up and placed him in her lap. Duck moved closer and snuggled itself into her chest. Damon looked over at duck.

"He's been doing that a lot lately." Damon said

"What?" Caroline asked

"Shoving his duck face into your boobs"

"Damon! He's a duck"

"Exactly, I wonder who he learned that from"

"He doesn't know what boobs are"

"Yes he does! He's a duck, I'm sure his are much more juicy and delicious"

"Damon!"

"Speaking of which where is Klausy? I'm hungry"

"I don't know"

"Well he needs to hurry up, I'm hungry and I'm not tipping him for being late"

Caroline took out her phone and called Klaus.

"Hello?" Klaus answered

"Hey, where are you?" Caroline asked

"Still in the office, working late it seems"

"Ok, did you eat yet?"

"No"

"I could drop something off for you"

"Sounds good"

Duck started shoving his bill between her breasts, as he if were searching for something. Caroline looked down at the duck.

"Stop that" Caroline said

"what?" Klaus asked

"Nothing, duck's being strange. I'll be there soon"

"See you soon love"

Duck start nipping at Caroline's hair again. Caroline pulled her hair away.

"What's gotten into you lately?" Caroline asked

* * *

"Klaus" Caroline whimpered

Klaus was standing behind her, pressing into her body while kissing her neck. Her hands were on the glass of the enormous windows in his office. She was pushing against the glass for balance.

"The food will get cold" Caroline said

"We can heat it up later" Klaus said pulling her skirt up

"The last time we did this, Stefan walked in on us"

"Good thing he's gone for the day"

* * *

Damon was asleep when he heard chicken crowing.

"Duck! Make him stop!" Damon yelled

Duck was quacking at chicken to stop. Chicken kept on crowing. Announcing to the world of his presence. Damon got up out of bed and went outside where he saw chicken standing in the middle of the room crowing. He picked up chicken.

"Stop that! Don't make me shake you like a british nanny!" Damon said

Chicken clucked and looked at Damon.

"Just don't do it so early in the morning. I'm tired! Blondie's tired. And you're making duck cranky!"

Damon sighed and put chicken down. Damon went back to his room and went back to sleep. Chicken went to go back to his coop when Duck stood up and shoved him. Chicken looked up at duck who looked annoyed and then quacked at him. Duck then went back to sleep. Chicken started to crow again, and duck quacked at him. Chicken stopped and went into his coop to sleep.

* * *

Yes, I was trying to avoid the gender of chicken for a while, but here it is. Guess no one's getting any breakfast eggs. XD Klaus didn't cheat on Caroline. He went to Chicago for inspiration and the fact that he's scared that he's falling in love with her. But don't you love brother bonding time? Anyways hope you were amused and leave me a review. thanks!


	14. Chapter 14

AN: Thank you for reading. No beta still. Was inspired yesterday by something I saw on tv. hope you like it.

* * *

Damon was frying up bacon in the kitchen while duck and chicken were watching him. He cracked open some eggs and scrambled them. Caroline walked in from work and sat down on the couch.

"Where's my dinner blondie?" Damon asked

"I'm tired Damon!" Caroline said

"Where the hell has Klaus been?"

"I don't know, he's been acting weird"

"Weird? You mean not a dick?"

"Damon!"

"He's busy at work like you said right? You did see him last week didn't you? He bent you over his desk again?"

"Damon!"

"What? Stefan told me"

"Oh my god!"

"Look instead of trying to analyze everything, why don't you just ask him? And if he avoids the question then I'll visit him with duck and chicken and straighten things out"

"What do you mean straighten things out? He wasn't cheating on me in Chicago, he went to paint in his old studio. So I have no idea what is going on with him"

"Maybe he's going through some changes like chicken"

"You're not helping"

"You can sit here and obsess over it or you can just ask him in person. And bring me dinner while you're at it"

* * *

Klaus was walking in the door of his apartment. His doorman greeted him and he saw Stefan standing there.

"What are you doing here?" Klaus asked

"I got you something"

"Really?"

"This way"

Stefan led him towards the back to the service elevator.

"Are you trying to kill me?" Klaus asked

"No, I don't want your job, I'd rather be an underling" Stefan replied

They walked to the elevator. The elevator door was open. Klaus's eyes widened at what was inside.

"Are these…" Klaus started

"yes they are"

"How did you get them?"

"You don't want to know"

"Are they really from.."

"Yes Shea stadium before they tore them down. Stadium seats. Cast iron and heavy as hell"

Klaus walked into the elevator and touched the stadium seats that were wedged inside. One end was on the floor, while the other end was up against the wall.

"I remember that story you told me. Thought you might like it" Stefan said

"Thank you"

"Well you're gonna have to carry it up yourself. The delivery guy threw out his back. And I have some place I need to be"

"You're really going to leave me with this alone?"

"You're a big boy you'll make it"

* * *

Caroline walked into Klaus's building and the doorman smiled at her. She smiled back and waved at him.

"He's in the service elevator in the back" the doorman said

"Thanks"

Caroline walked to the back and found Klaus staring at the stadium seats in the elevator.

"What the hell is that?" Caroline asked

"Stadium seats" Klaus answered as he turned around

Caroline looked at the seats and then back at him confused. Klaus walked up to her and kissed her on the cheek.

"What are you doing with them?" Caroline asked

"Stefan gave them to me"

"Why would he do that?"

"An old story I told him"

"What stadium are they from?"

"Shea Stadium before they tore it down"

"Wait, you know baseball?"

"Yes, I am aware of baseball"

"But don't you play cricket in Britain?"

"Yes, but I did spend a few years here and yes I do know the rules of baseball. Don't be so stereotypical love"

"I'm just surprised that's all"

"Well I'm moving them into my apartment. Care to join me?"

Caroline walked into the elevator with Klaus. He pushed the button for his floor and the elevator started to go up.

"I wanted to ask you something" Caroline said

"Ask away love"

The elevator suddenly stopped. The lights went out. The emergency lights went on and Caroline grabbed onto Klaus.

"It's alright, it's alright" Klaus said

"What's happening?"

"Probably mechanical problems"

Klaus reached to the panel and pushed the button for service. Nothing happened. He opened the box saw there was no phone inside. He reached into his pocket and and pulled out his phone. He called Stefan as he hoped he'd still be nearby.

"Klaus?" Stefan answered

"Stefan, I hope you're still nearby. Seems Caroline and I are stuck in the elevator" Klaus said

"Well that kinda sucks. Cause there's a blackout in the city right now  
"What?"

"Yeah, I'll head back to your building and let them know"

Klaus put his phone away and held Caroline closer.

"Nothing to be alarmed about, but it seems the entire city is having a blackout" Klaus said

"WHAT?!"

"Calm down, it should be over shortly"

"This is not funny! I can't be in here!"

"Are you afraid of enclosed spaces?"

"I don't want to die in here!"

"Calm down! You're not dying! We're just stuck here, temporarily"

* * *

Damon noticed all the lights were out and used his phone as a light to see around his apartment. He saw duck swimming in the pool and chicken scratching around in his sandbox.

"You guys are good, I'm gonna go to bed, be good" Damon said

* * *

Caroline sat on the floor of the elevator with Klaus next to her. He put his arm around her as she rested her head on his shoulder.

"So what did you want to ask me about?" Klaus asked

"Um, nothing really. I never figured you to be a baseball fan"

"There's a lot you don't know about me"

"Yeah, I'm starting to realize that now. You've been acting weird lately"

"Weird?"

"Like, you're not over as much, and you don't really talk to me anymore. It's like whenever we see each other we're having sex, which isn't a bad thing, but it kinda feels like you're pulling away from me"

"I've just been really busy at work, love. This new acquisition is taking up a lot of my time. It wasn't my intention to make you feel like that"

"Why are you so closed off?"

"I'm not"

"You don't want me to meet your family, I mean it was awkward that time I met your brothers and I was in your sweater"

"You've already met them, and they're all bloody insane. The less I see of them the better"

"Are you ashamed of me?"

"No, why would you think that? If anything I"m ashamed of them"

"I'm serious"

"I've known them my entire life and I can't stand them! I don't know how you can be in the room with them for more than 5 minutes"

"Klaus"

"If you're so insistent on meeting them fine, but I did warn you. Rebekah is the only girl and she can be quite mean"

"I wonder who she gets that from"

"She does have 4 older brothers"

"And what about your parents?"

"What about them?"

"Like what do they do?"

"Nothing. Mother is a completely boring socialite hosting tea parties."

"And your dad?"

"He's dead"

"Oh, sorry"

"Doesn't matter"

"So you and Stefan used to hang out in Chicago? Is that when you learned about baseball?"

"No, I learned about it when I was a child. I remember one time I must have been about 7 or 8 and were in New York for some reason, my father at the time was there on business. I remember that day he took me to a baseball game. He stopped drinking and was actually sober. We watched the Met's play, their mascot was a ridiculous man with a giant baseball head. He bought me popcorn, hot dogs, lemonade. It was one of the happiest days of my childhood. That was when he still thought I was his son."

"What?"

"Mikael is not my father, biologically speaking. My mother had an affair and I was the result of it. Once he found out, things changed, and I was exiled to boarding school."

"Do you know who your real father is?"

"He's dead. And that is all my mother will tell me. No point in dwelling in the past on someone's who's dead"

Caroline was shocked at how calmly Klaus was saying all this. She wrapped her arms around him and held him close.

"I don't want your pity"

"It's not pity"

"It was stupid trying to move these seats"

"No it isn't. You're trying remember that day, that moment when everything was just perfect before it all went to hell. I know. I've been there. My dad turned out to be gay and left my mom and me when I was a kid. Imagine explaining that to everyone"

"We're a lot alike Caroline"

* * *

Damon was knitting again, this time a scarf. Duck stumbled around trying to get the sweater Damon had made for him off. He quacked and quacked. Damon looked over at duck.

"It's a good color on you, brings out your eyes" Damon said

The doorbell rang and Damon got up to answer it.

"You, where the hell have you been? I've missed my dinner service" Damon said

"Move out of the way" Klaus said carrying a large box in

"What's in the box?" Damon asked

Klaus placed it on the counter and opened it up. The inciting aroma waifed through the air. Damon looked inside the box and saw a large 7 course meal.

"For me? You shouldn't have" Damon said

"Yes, I got you a whole ham to eat, now go eat it in your room and leave me and Caroline alone" Klaus said

"Blondie won't be back for another hour"

"Yes, I'm surprising her, and this is a large ham"

"Why yes it is"

Klaus handed him the ham.

"Now just stay in your room for the rest of the night" Klaus said

"What have you planned for Blondie? Are you going to make a respectable woman out of her?"

"What? No!" Klaus yelled

"You don't have to yell"

Klaus patted down his jacket, feeling the jewelry box in his pocket. He relaxed when he realized it was there. He saw duck struggling on the floor with the sweater. He started pecking at it. Klaus bent down and pulled the hideous sweater off the duck. Duck flapped its wings happily and walked over to Klaus.

"There you feel better?" Klaus asked

Duck jumped up, indicating he wanted to picked up. Klaus picked up duck and held him against his body. Duck started shoving its face inside his jacket looking around.

"No utensils with this ham?" Damon asked

Klaus turned around and saw Damon digging through the box.

"Stop that!" Klaus yelled

Klaus rushed over to the counter and put duck on the counter as well. He pushed Damon out of the way.

"That's not for you!" Klaus said

"So possessive. I wonder what she sees in you"

"Just take your ham and be gone" Klaus said

"What are you planning tonight?"

"None of your business"

"I'm just going to find out anyways and it looks like you need all the help you can get"

Klaus reached into his jacket to find the jewelry box and realized it was gone. He patted down the jacket and it still wasn't there. He took his jacket off and searched for it. He looked and saw duck standing on the counter next to the open jewelry box and unraveled ribbon.

"NO!" Klaus grabbed duck

Damon looked at the open jewelry box and then at duck.

"You didn't! Tell me you didn't!" Klaus yelled while holding duck

"Don't shake the duck!" Damon yelled taking duck from him

"The duck ate it!"

"The duck didn't eat it! Well maybe, duck did you eat it?"

Duck looked at Damon and tilted its head.

"He ate it!" Klaus yelled

"What exactly did duck eat?"

"A diamond bracelet!"

"Bracelet? That's gotta hurt coming out."

"Get it out of him! Now!"

"I kinda can't! He goes when he wants"

"Get it out! I planned out this entire night!"

"Relax, we have an hour to figure this out. Duck, don't eat shiny things anymore"

Duck only quacked in response while Klaus and Damon looked at him trying to figure out what to do.

* * *

lolz. Hope you were amused. The stadium seats was something I got from watching Bones. And yes I realize duck eating an entire bracelet would be painful. But hey, let's just see where this goes ok? I hope you were amused. Leave me a review.


	15. Chapter 15

AN: Here's another chapter. No beta, hope you're amused. Yes another chapter so soon, consider it a bday present. XD

* * *

Duck stood on the counter looking at the two of them.

"Get it out! I need that bracelet back!" Klaus said

"We'll get it. Don't get your knickers all twisted up in a bunch"

"I planned out everything, and I'm not about to be defeated by a duck"

"To be fair this is a smart duck. He managed to get chicken under control. No more crowing at dawn"

"I don't have time for this! I need that bracelet back!"

"Why are you so wound up for? I thought blondie was doing that for you"

"Shut up Damon!"

"I know you two are doing perverted things behind closed doors, in offices, on desks, probably up against the window cause you're kinky like that"

"You're not helping!"

"Relax, Blondie won't care, she's just happy you showed up, so she can ride you"

"Bloody hell Damon! Shut up! Do not talk about her like that!"

"What? I live with her, I've heard you two knocking into furniture, traumatizing the animals. Whatever you had planned will still go on and Blondie won't know the difference. I know you got her diamond bracelet, a blowjob bracelet"

"Shut up Damon! I love her!"

Damon paused for a moment.

"You what?" Damon asked

"This is ridiculous" Klaus said packing up the box

"No wait, don't be so hasty. We can work through this. Duck we're going on a trip. Put your spats on"

* * *

Damon and Klaus barged into the vet's office. Damon holding duck in his arms rushed over to the desk. April looked up at him.

"Can I help you?" April asked

"My duck ate something he shouldn't have, we need to get it out of him" Damon said

"What did he eat?"

* * *

Caroline walked into the apartment. It looked like a complete mess. There was food scattered on the counter, the large box it came in laid on the floor. There was a ham sitting on the counter with a fork stabbed on the side of it. Duck was no where to be found but chicken was scratching around in the sandbox.

"Damon? Damon?!" Caroline yelled

Caroline walked over to the counter and looked at all the food. She took a container out and opened it. She smiled when she smelled it. She grabbed a fork and started eating it.

* * *

Damon and Klaus were in the examine room with the vet.

"Let me get this straight. You think that this duck ate a diamond bracelet." the vet said

"Yes, and we need to get it out" Klaus said

"How big was the bracelet? A ring I could picture happening, but a bracelet? The duck would end up choking on it first" the vet said

"Look I really need this bracelet back" Klaus said

"It's a blowjob bracelet" Damon added

"Damon!" Klaus yelled

"That's what it is"

"Can you give the duck something to make him go a bit faster?"

"Hey! No harsh drugs on duck. He has a sensitive stomach"

"He won't have anything if he doesn't give that bracelet back!"

* * *

Caroline was already on the third container of food. It was delicious and she couldn't help herself. She wondered where everyone went. She saw chicken scratching in the sand and then started walking towards her. She noticed something shiny on its neck. She put her food on the arm of the couch and walked over to chicken.

"What do you have there?" Caroline asked as she picked up chicken

She looked at what was around chickens' neck. It was a bracelet. It appeared to be a diamond bracelet. She wondered where chicken got it from. She took it off chicken and slipped it onto her wrist. She looked at how the light caught the diamonds, making it glitter and shine even more.

"Hmm, maybe Damon got it for Rose. I'll just wear it for now" Caroline said

* * *

Damon and Klaus walked back into the apartment. They saw chicken pecking at the box on the floor. They saw the food still scattered all over the counter. The ham had a piece taken out of it.

"Someone ate my ham!" Damon said

"Damon! We have to clean up this mess before Caroline gets back" Klaus said

Damon put duck down on the floor and went to take the box away from chicken. Klaus looked at the food and noticed some of it was missing. He looked over and saw a food container on the arm of the couch.

Caroline came out holding another food container in her hands and stopped when she saw Damon and Klaus.

"Why is duck wearing a diaper?" Caroline asked

"You're back early" Damon said

"Not really" Caroline said walking over to them

Klaus noticed the bracelet on Caroline's wrist. He saw that she was eating the 7 course meal without him.

"You guys were gone for a while. Where where you? And whatever you got Klaus it's amazing!" Caroline said grabbing another food container

Klaus was speechless. Everything he had planned for tonight was ruined. Damon looked over at Klaus, he noticed that Caroline was already wearing the bracelet. He looked over at duck.

"Sorry duck" Damon said

"So what were you guys up anyways?" Caroline asked

"Nothing" Klaus said

Damon grabbed the ham and then picked up duck.

"Chicken let's go" Damon said

Damon went to his room and chicken followed. Damon came back out again.

"I need a fork" Damon said

Damon took a fork and knife out.

"Chicken found your bracelet. Is it for Rose?" Caroline said taking the bracelet off

Damon stopped and looked at Klaus who seemed so defeated.

"It's not mine" Damon said

"Huh?" Caroline said

Damon rushed back to his room. He saw chicken pecking at the diaper that was on duck.

"Hey, hey, don't do that" Damon said

Duck quacked at chicken.

"He's been through a lot today" Damon said

Caroline held the bracelet in her hands and wondered why Damon rushed off so quickly. She turned and saw Klaus putting his jacket on. She put the bracelet on the counter and walked over to him.

"Where are you going?" Caroline asked

"It's late, I should go"

"I don't know what you and Damon were up to, but I got hungry and started to eat without you. I hope you're not mad"

"Course not, I got it for you"

"Then stay a bit, I don't know what you ordered but it was delicious, especially that green foam thing with the red jelly"

"That was Broccoli Purée and San Marzano Tomato Marmalade"

"Um ok, whatever that was. I think there's dessert left. Just stay a bit please?"

Caroline's hand slipped into his his and tugged on it, leading him back to the kitchen. Klaus followed her.

"You can tell me what's what, they all sound fancy according to you" Caroline said

Klaus picked up a container of food and opened it.

"This is Roasted Chestnut Potage. Which consists of Celery Root Glaze and Black Winter Truffle Grissini"

"See everything sounds fancy when you say it"

Klaus looked around and picked up another container. He opened it. Caroline looked down at the bracelet and then noticed the ribbon and the jewelry box.

"Confit of Trumpet Royale Mushroom, made of grilled Belgian Endive, Shaved Cauliflower, Italian Capers, Sylvetta Arugula and Curry Scented Oil"

"It was you" Caroline said

"What?"

"The bracelet, it was from you. But why?"

Klaus put the food down and sighed.

"I had planned this night out. But everything in the world was working against me. I wanted this to be special"

"It is special. You're here"

"It wasn't suppose to be like this. And then we thought the duck ate the bracelet, and we took it to the vet to get it out, but it was here the whole time!"

"Hey, it's ok" Caroline said placing her hand on his chest

"No it's not! This is not how I envisioned the night's events"

"Well the night's not over, so after you tried to impress me with your fancy sounding food, what were you going to do? Distract me with shiny objects?"

"I feel ridiculous"

"Actually you're overdressed"

Caroline pulled him in for a kiss. Her arms pulled him closer, as his wrapped around her waist. He pulled away slightly, still pressing his forehead to hers.

"Caroline, I wanted to tell you something"

"Ok"

Klaus pulled back, and cradled her face in his hands.

"You are beautiful" Klaus said

Caroline laughed as she placed her hands on his wrists.

"You're not so bad yourself" Caroline said

"And I don't know why you live with a duck and chicken, or how you put up with Damon. But most of all I don't know why you put up with me. But for some reason you do. And, and I love you"

"Oh, Klaus"

Caroline pulled him back for another kiss.

"I love you too" Caroline said

Klaus felt his heart explode when she said it back to him. He reached down and picked up the bracelet.

"I got this for you, I hope you like it" Klaus said placing it on her wrist

"I love it"

* * *

Damon was in his room eating his ham when he heard furniture being knocked around in the room next to him.

"TV time!" Damon said getting up with the ham

Duck waddled after him and chicken followed. Damon sat on the couch and watched tv, louder than usual.

* * *

Elena was jogging through the park, when she noticed Damon walking with a yoga matt. She stopped and watched as he walked over to a yoga class and placed his matt down. Damon walked over to Rose who was surprised to see him.

"What are you doing here?" Rose asked

"Came to see mop dog"

"Are you here to take my class?"

"That too"

"You know you have to sign up for this class"

"I'm not sure if this is what I want to do yet, consider me sitting in today"

"Only because Gavin likes you"

The puli came up to Damon and brushed along his leg. Damon sat down on his yoga matt and petted the dog.

"What's up mop dog? Rose been treating you well?" Damon asked

Elena stared and watched Damon in class. She felt the buzzing from her phone and saw that it was Matt.

"Hey Matt" Elena said

"You almost done with your run yet?"

* * *

Klaus led Caroline into the restaurant. His hand still on her back, he leaned to kiss her on her temple.

"You can still leave now" Klaus said

"They can't be that bad"

"I did warn you"

Caroline sat down next to Klaus, while his siblings sat at the table. They were all looking at her and she felt uncomfortable under their stare.

"Shall we order?" Klaus asked

"I already did" Rebekah said

"How did you know what I wanted?" Klaus asked

"I always know, I've know you my entire life sadly. Right now it looks like you're in a blonde phase. Not sure if this an upgrade or downgrade from the last one" Rebekah said

"Oh come now, she's much more fun than the last one, she likes to be naked more" Kol teased

"Kol!" Klaus yelled

"Why am I here for this?" Finn asked

"Come now, you enjoy watching our younger siblings fight, it's quite entertaining" Elijah said

Caroline took a sip of her water and the bracelet she wore caught the light. Rebekah immediately noticed.

"So are you a complete blonde bimbo or just a gold digging trollop?" Rebekah asked

"Rebekah!" Klaus yelled

"Is there a difference?" Kol asked

"One means the bleach has reached her brain and she's completely useless, the other means she's only here for Nik's money" Rebekah said

"Well she is quite limber" Kol said

"And you're a pervert!" Caroline said

"Feisty!" Kol said

"And you're used to all the attention being the only girl, but you're just a rude, stuck up, condescending spoiled brat!" Caroline said

Kol laughed and sat back in his seat. Rebekah scowled and was about to reply when the waiters came with their food. Finn and Elijah began to eat. Kol watched amused as Klaus reached for Caroline's hand.

"We're up to name calling so soon? I'd hope you last through the appetizers" Rebekah said

"I've lost my appetite" Caroline said

"Is that your method of staying thin? Starving yourself?" Rebekah said

"I don't know why you're being so horrible to me, you don't even know me" Caroline said

"And I don't want to. You're the crazy girl that came screaming into a restaurant throwing things, and attacking my brother. Then you show up at his apartment, screaming again, threatening me, and you expect me to welcome you with open arms?" Rebekah said

"She does have a point, Bexx isn't mean without a reason" Kol said

"That was just a misunderstanding, and I'm sorry if I threatened you, but I didn't know you were his sister, and I thought-"

"You thought what?"

"Oh" Kol said

"What?" Rebekah asked

"It seems Caroline here mistook you for a girl that Nik was cheating with" Kol said smirking

"Ew. That is disgusting, he's my brother!"

"I didn't know!"

"Well you know now!"

"Ok I'm sorry!"

"This is better than the shows Sage watches on TV" Finn said

"Well now that we've had our first outburst before the main course, can we all calm down?" Elijah said

* * *

Damon was shopping at the farmer's market. He walked along the booths and then he saw a familiar face.

"Anna?" Damon called out

Anna turned around.

"It's you again" Anna said

"Good to see you too"

"Last time I ever do you a favor"

"What? I brought you in good business"

"And you invaded the dressing rooms too. No men in the dressing rooms you know that"

"It's my roommate, she needed an opinion, besides I would not touch that"

"Who are you and what have you done to Damon?"

"What? I'm a changed man, what can I say?"

"Since when do you eat organic?"

"I don't, it's for my duck"

"What?"

"I have a duck, and a chicken, they like to eat organic"

"Um ok"

"Anyways I'll tell Blondie to stop by your store again. I'm sure her boyfriend really liked what you picked out for her"

"What can I say I'm gifted"

"That you are, you might have to pick out another one for her soon"

"Already?"

"I should get a cut of your commission"

"Dream on!"

Elena watched from a distance how Damon flirted with Anna. He was always with a new woman every time she saw him.

* * *

Kol watched in amusement as the two blondes were arguing across the table. He took a sip of his drink and leaned back in his seat. Elijah and Finn were finishing off their dessert while the two women argued. Klaus rubbed his eyes and reached out to hold Caroline's hand.

"I have no idea what my idiot brother sees in you" Rebekah said

"I already apologized, what else do you want? Blood?" Caroline said

"I want you to get out of our lives and to leave us alone. Nik doesn't need another gold digging trollop!"

"Stop calling me that! You don't know me at all!"

"Would you prefer bimbo instead? I doubt you have the brains to take his money"

"I'm not a bimbo! I'm not a gold digger! I just love him!"

The table became quiet once the words left her mouth. Caroline grabbed her purse and left the table.

"Well done everyone" Klaus said getting up, going after her

"Well this is certainly an interesting turn of events" Elijah said

Caroline was walking towards the door of the restaurant. She had never been so angry and insulted in her life.

"Caroline" Klaus said

"Forget it, I'm not going back"

"I'm not asking you to"

"You're not?"

"No, don't leave me there with them"

"It's not funny, your sister is so mean to me"

"I told you she was mean"

"And your brothers are all weird. Kol keeps staring at my boobs, and Elijah and Finn are just watching and laughing"

"I told you they were insane, why didn't you believe me?"

"I don't know. I just thought, that maybe, we could-"

"It's alright. Let's go, you've had enough for one night"

* * *

There you go. no duck didn't eat it, the bracelet was far too large, but look at how these two guys act during a crisis! XD Hope you were amused. There Klaus said it. And yes it's my bday, so here's my present to you, another chapter. and there is more of duck and chicken coming up. Leave me a review. Thanks for reading!


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